I know, yesterday was three more things, but that was a group of three things that I need to work on. Today is more about three random things that I should get out of the way, and then move on and keep going. That being said, two of them are about difficulties in moving on. Maybe all three are.
One thing is frustration with my desk and dresser. I have always had a tendency toward clutter, which I am not proud of. As things have piled up on me and my ability to get through them has diminished, I have a network of piles of books and mailings and notes about things to do. Redundancy is an issue; I am on my 7th foreclosure notice. I guess that means they have no confidence in registered mail, or me. (Probably me.)
I had felt like I couldn't get started on other things until I could really get to the bottom of this clutter. It appears all this does is prevent me from starting on other things. I have been knocking bits of it away, but my grand idea for just focusing on a giant push through so it is gone was never realistic. It wasn't even that glamorous a fantasy! Instead, opportunistically, when I have a few minutes I grab a few things.
Overworked, overtired, but persistently working my way through, but not letting that reality keep me from other things -- that is what I need to accept. Moving on.
I have also been a bit stymied with what to do with the blogging. There were things I knew I wanted to blog about, and other things that seemed to need it. I hate the lack of order, but they all blend together messily anyway. If I am concerned about political discourse and situations in the world, they often relate deeply to what I am reading and why.
I just finished my 2018 Black History month reading. I am still working on the post-inauguration reading that I started in January 2017. I hope to finish by September, but there are no guarantees. I believe that Monday and Tuesday I will cover some children's books, Wednesday I will summarize the Black History month reading that was not picture books. Then, as I get into additional detail on some of the books in the following weeks, maybe that will give me the path to talk about other things. It will be messy and without clearly-defined boundaries, but maybe that's just life.
Which leads to the third thing.
I have enough problems in my own sphere to keep me plenty busy, but the pressures of the rest of the world are felt too. They are felt hard.
They are often felt worst by those who are trying to help and make positive changes. There are policies that make things harder, attitudes that make abuse more prevalent, and caring even when you are not directly affected can be overwhelming. There have been some notable suicides, but there are also ones that probably aren't noticed. There have been attempts.
That can be really easy to get mired down in, and I am not in this post going to tell you anything to fix it. I just ask that we be kind. Keep an eye on people who might be struggling, whether you know them or not. A small bit of kindness can still be enough to get someone to the next bit.
It was not that long ago that I tried to really make a point of keeping in touch with the people I cared about. Then the world crashed down. I am lucky that there are people who keep track of me. I can try and be better, but my point is that it takes everyone.
You do what you can. You may save lives. You may save your own soul.
Don't give up.
No comments:
Post a Comment