Resolved for me: My village

One humbling thing this last year has been the persistence of some friends in checking on me.

I am not the most fun ever now, my availability is not as flexible, and I may take super long times to get back to you, just because of the other things on my plate. Nonetheless many people have been kind, generous, and sometimes even a bit stubborn when needed.

I want to do better on my side for that.

First of all, I don't want to make everyone drag me along. I can be at least a little more on the ball. We are getting better at working out respite time, and as I am successfully getting more alone time, I should probably consider getting in more social time.

There are also friends that I am not connecting with now whom I still value. This group of friends tends to involve people not on Facebook, so they don't necessarily see updates. I remember sending e-mail to one friend. It had been a while, so she expressed surprise but she wrote back right away, and then I didn't get back to her. That's embarrassing, but it's me.

I just sorted my send folder to see, and that was three years ago. Checking on some other addresses, it looks like I really started dropping the ball in 2016. That makes total sense. I still hope I can do better.

Part of having that hope of doing better is that patience that has been extended to me by others. As I write, hey, I don't know how regular I will be, but I will accept your patience if you will offer it.

I have had to accept a lot of help in this part of my life. I preferred being on the other side of that, but maybe it made me cocky. Maybe life is just cyclical, and this is my turn.

There are also people who have knowledge and skills and access that may be helpful for me. I will try reaching out more.

The first time didn't work out. I messaged the daughter of a friend of my mother's to try and arrange a phone call, and she didn't reply. That could be discouraging, but she also has three other kids. That call could still happen, but it might not. There will be things that don't work out, but that might not make them failures.

I think of this as building my village. Someone else used that phrase as she started on a new phase of life. Well, this is a continuing phase of life, and the village is partially there, but I can strengthen it, and be more aware of it.

That's my hope for 2019.

Well, it's my more emotional, interpersonal hope. I have some additional and probably not as important things that I will write about tomorrow.