As grinchy as I get

Some people have told me that I would be a good mother, but my sisters are convinced that I should not have kids. The reason for this – and this may be the most shocking and controversial thing I will ever write on this blog, and if you have young children reading, pull them away quickly – is that I do not believe in trying to make kids believe in Santa Clause.

It’s not that they can’t know about him or watch Christmas specials. I love Christmas specials! I love the movie Elf. I love Christmas decorations and carols.

I admit to a certain irritation when the whole premise is that Christmas is canceled if Santa doesn’t make it, which is perhaps why I prefer the 1966 How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Also, Muppet Family Christmas is awesome—it’s tragic how unknown it is—but when Santa does show up there, it is Doc dressed up, and there is no debate about believing or not.

I just would never want to make any pretense that it is all anything but a story. I don’t believe in lying. Sure, it’s not the worst deception, because it is one that they will eventually find out, and it is about the sweetness and innocence, so there are definitely worse reasons for lying, but still, I can’t get behind it.

I’m sure part of it is my memory of my older sister telling me. I don’t remember what she said; I just have this sense memory of being in our bedroom and it was a gray day outside, and feeling crushed and betrayed. 

Also, I don’t like the blackmail aspects of it. I think the Elf on the Shelf is creepy and stupid, and constantly being watched and judged to determine if you are worthy of toys sounds ridiculous. Sure, we took away Krampus, but still, part of being a child is not being great at long range planning and impulse control, and part of being a parent is understanding that. Also, are we then saying that better behavior equals more toys and that is the secret of happiness? Because toy overload does not increase happiness. So a few meaningul gifts, which is probably better, means they weren’t that good?

Even if the intentions are good with the deception, there are a lot of things about it that don’t work out. For example, poverty! I remember reading an essay once from someone who grew up poor. They had cousins who were better off, and stayed with them for Christmas. Well, she and her siblings each got a coloring book and some crayons, and the cousins had everything else. She wrote that she thought it was nice of Santa to think of them, but it was clear that he cared about rich people more. I hate that. Maybe poor people should be motivated to have their children behave badly and then just avoid the issue altogether.

Also, I’m not sure it’s necessary. When children watch Disney movies, they don’t believe they really happened, do they? But they still enjoy them and get into them, and they enjoy it as fiction, and that’s what it is. I love fiction too. I just think it’s important to keep it separate from the truth.

So, this is me, grumpy old person, who will read A Christmas Carol again tonight, as I always do, and may also watch The Year Without A Santa Clause, and that will be fine, and I am not corrupting any children or robbing them of their childhood, because I do not have any.