It should always be a good day to die

This does kind of relate to the end of the world stuff, which yes, is primarily dumb jokes, but there are some real concerns there.

Also, there is this Youtube video being passed around about how you should do what you love, because life is too short, and people are finding it so brilliant and inspirational, but I am more influenced by how that same concept was used in Office Space years ago.

It was the same question, “If money wasn’t an object, what would you do, and then you should do that.” It did not help Ron Livingston’s character at all, because he didn’t seem to be very passionate about anything, but eventually it did turn out that it was important to him to be outdoors, he did care about other people, and he did care about Jennifer Aniston. It is not traditional for someone who can have an office job to end up going to manual labor, but it worked for him.

When I first went to Italy, I wanted to be able to talk to my cousins and get to know them. In addition to practicing Italian in general, I memorized two fallback questions. They were “How did you meet?” and “Tell me about your work.” Actually, they didn’t like talking about themselves for the most part, so that didn’t work well, but the job question was especially weird to them. They do not care. It’s just something they do.

This is not that they don’t enjoy life or that they aren’t passionate; please, these are Italians. However, it’s not about work for them. It’s about their family, or their hobbies, or the places they travel, or cooking. That is not completely true. One cousin, Roberto, was a math professor, and he still does some tutoring to make ends meet, but now he is a tai chi instructor. In that case, he did want his passion to be his job and he made it happen. But it doesn’t always have to work that way.

I was talking to Cute Cafeteria Guy when I got back, and he totally agreed. Right then, he was working as a cashier. Before that he worked in a bank, and after that he worked at a car lot, and some of those might seem like downgrades or upgrades, but ultimately he could be great at any job where he was interacting with the public, because he liked people and he was good with them.

So, not long after that I became unemployed myself, and although I had always thought of my job as a temporary stop on the way to being a writer, suddenly not having a job was a real blow. Maybe the specific job I was doing had not been part of my identity, but being able to stay gainfully employed had been. I had to re-evaluate myself.

My current job is okay. It’s not particularly creative, but I’m good at it, which is satisfying, and I can leave a Twitter feed open and listen to music while I am working, which is good. It would not be enough for me though. My joy comes because there are so many other things that I care about that are part of my life. I write, fiction and non-fiction. I sing. I have good friends. I travel. I realize I want to do things and I do them. I frustrate myself a lot of the time that way, but I find a lot of enjoyment too.

The other thing that came up is an advice column where a young married couple wanted to take a year off to travel, and they were worried about what other people would think. Someone else said that they had done something similar and they ran into many older couples, and many women who had intended to go with their first husbands, but he died and they were there with their second husbands.

Okay, I did finally give in and start a 401K, and I guess that’s a good thing. However, I know people who put huge amounts into stocks and CDs and investments, and I hope they get to enjoy it someday, but they may not. They could die, their stocks could lose their value (many already have had issues there), or they may live but not have the energy and strength that they once had, curtailing some experiences.

And before we start throwing around the term ”YOLO”, people use that really stupidly. Yes, you get one earth life, but it is neither the end nor the beginning of your immortal soul, and that is worth taking into account.

What I am trying to get at is that there are lots of different things that can be part of a fulfilling, rich, happy, authentic life. It won’t be pure hedonism, but it should have pleasure. It needs to have kindness and relationships in it. There are just some things that will never work, but within those boundaries there is amazing variety.

I know there is a lot of ugliness in the world, and it’s not that we can ignore it— I don’t think we should ignore it— but we need to be aware of the beauty too, and to appreciate it. It’s building relationships, and talents, and knowledge. It’s finding joy. It’s not living every day like it’s your last, which would be exhaustings. It’s making a life that is full of good days, through big and small things.

So, last year I made a 10-year plan, and the end goals there will all take the full ten years. If I die tomorrow, I will not make it to Africa, Asia, South America, or Antarctica. However, I really enjoyed what I have seen of North America, Europe, and Australia and New Zealand. Give me another five years, and I will have South America and Africa. Give me just 2013, and I will at least see Mount Rushmore.

I think it will be 2022 before I can do a triathlon, but just get me through August and I will run a 5K. I haven’t sold a screenplay, but I’ve written some stuff I love, and hey, now some people are reading the comic book, and a few have read the children’s book, which even had some illustrations with it. Next Christmas time, I will have been working on my drawings for about a year, and I will take another shot. Maybe I can even add some color this time without ruining every thing.

Remember when I had that list of three bands that I missed seeing in college? I have seen all three of them now! And then it went to five bands that I missed, past college, but I have seen one of those too, and now there are more, but still, I have been to some great shows, and I will keep going as many chances as I get.

Oh, and my birthday party! If the world ends now, birthday karaoke doesn’t happen, but at least I’ve still done it other times.

This is not even dreaming big; it is dreaming specifically for me. This is who I am, this is what I want, this makes me happy. This is what I’m going to do.