Regrouping

I thought I was going to write about healthcare, but I am having a hard time concentrating on it. 

My state of mind is kind of off and I am trying to get back on track.

Part of it is that there were three big weights on me. 

I was giving a talk in church, and thinking about that a lot in the time leading up to it. That was resolved about two weeks ago.. 

I also found that as a returning student, getting back into the swing of writing papers was harder than I thought. I admit overthinking was a part of that, which is such a core part of me.

I had to write four papers for the first class. For the first one, just getting started was a struggle. Eventually I got it submitted and it passed. 

A lot of photos and video clips get captioned that someone "understood the assignment". 

It took me longer than it should have to understand the second assignment. First I missed that we had switched from writing about types of technology to specific tools. Then, once I got that down and made my recommendation, I did not give reasons for it. I thought that from the paragraphs leading up to it the choice was obvious; that is so me! However, when they are grading you on your ability to make a reasoned argument, you need to complete the argument. 

Actually, the third went pretty well, but then I struggled with the fourth, possibly because of the third weight.

It was really difficult finding a new PCP for Mom.

That is something else healthcare related, so you can see how that would be on my mind. At that point, it was just one more thing. Finding someone who could meet her specific needs in the near future, rather than 4-6 months out, was not easy. 

There had been on potential solution that seemed like it was going to work, and then it fell apart a few days before the first appointment. There are a lot of ways in which being a senior works better, because there are good things about Medicare. For the things that don't work well, there is a lot of regulation surrounding it. 

Anyway, for a few weeks I was struggling with those three things and getting really frustrated with myself for not concentrating better or just being able to get these stupid things done. 

Then they got done, and now I am kind of dazed.

There's plenty of other things to do, but I still need to refocus. 

(Also, I am tired, but at this point that's a personality trait.)

For some things, I know I just need to keep plugging along. For others I need to change habits, which is difficult, but I at least know what I need to do; it is just a matter of doing it.

Then there are other things where I really don't know.