Task: The Bear in the Net

I wrote this up last night, before I knew what the day would bring. That may be for the best. Probably the last two posts covered most of what it would be reasonable to say, and I don’t think being constantly driven by the news cycle is healthy for me. So today is light, and I may be able to manage two more light ones for next week, and then it’s probably going to turn heavy again. It’s just a heads up.

Tomorrow night I am going to the Teddy Bear Toss. That is a tradition with many hockey teams, including the local Portland Winterhawks, where  attendees bring bears, and after the home team scores its first goal of the night, everyone throws their bears on to the ice, where they are rounded up for distribution to children. 

Collecting toys for kids had always been a cause close to my heart, I like sports, and I prefer minor leagues to big teams, though ultimately I only really care about the Ducks. Still, I don’t mind a game now and then, and I love teddy bears.

This will be my second time. The first time was in 2009, the day after Thanksgiving, and the game was exciting, and the sight of all of those teddies being tossed is amazing, but I ended up being very distracted by one bear getting caught in the net on his way down. Some people tried to get him down, but they couldn’t, so ultimately he stayed there for the rest of the game.

My empathy extends to inanimate objects, and I kept going back to looking at this bear, and feeling sorry for him. After they got all of the toys off the ice they did a count, and before the end of the game the flashed the total:16321. And all I could think was “Plus 1!”

Anyway, the story stayed with me, and grew, and the only thing to do when that happens is to write it out, so I did, and basically I had a children’s book there. I did submit it to one agent, and never heard back, and I did some research, but basically the story was sitting around, and as I was getting back into writing and setting goals, that was a big one. Do something with this, because I like the story, and I want it to go somewhere.

What I have realized though, is that it isn’t practical for me to be submitting this to publishers. I would need to be going through a lot of contacts, and really focus on it. If I wanted to write children’s books, that would make sense, but I feel like I have one children’s book in me, and this is it. On the other hand I have many screenplays, written and unwritten, and I need to focus my attention there for writing and submitting.

Still, I couldn’t abandon the Bear completely, because I do care about it, and it has meaning to me, and I have been posting a lot of web content now, so that seemed like the next logical way to go. Since I am getting into drawing, prepping to start illustrating the comic, I thought I could do some sketches for the story. Well, that’s harder than it sounds. I have some, but they are not great. It’s what I can do now, and it is something.

You know, if someday, as I accomplish other things and make contacts, we can do something with it, that would be great. I am not even ruling out that as my drawing improves I might not take another crack at illustrating it myself. Right now, there is still too much chagrin at the difference between what starts out in my head and what ends up on the paper. That’s okay. That will get better. This is what we have for where I am.

So, although tomorrow the normal travel blog post will go up (I am starting on our Mexico trip), there will also be a special post on this blog, with the text of the story and scanned copies of the some very rudimentary drawings. Perhaps that is my Christmas gift to you, but it is also my duty to the story. I write because I have to, but then the next thing I need is to share it.

I hope you like it. I hope you share it. I hope parents read it to kids, and aunts and uncles read it to nieces and nephews, and that the children take equal interests in hockey games and charitable giving, and that those interests are encouraged. Perhaps I will tell some moderately sad Christmas stories next week about why I care about toys for poor kids, except I’m still supposed to be reviewing bands and I totally should write about the 21^st before we get there. We’ll see.

By all means you are welcome to email the link, print the text, and engage in any type of non-commercial sharing. Obviously, any type of commercial use without express written consent is out, and I can’t imagine that I would consent without it involving me getting a cut, unless it was a charity thing for toys for kids. Still, the permission would need to be obtained. I just needed to get that out of the way. Merry Christmas.

http://sporkful.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-bear-in-net-by-gina-harris.html

Talking about guns

One thing I have noticed about dogs, at least my dogs, is they have no concept of the fact that cars will hit them. When we go for walks, even if they may theoretically see a car coming, they have no sense of danger, and usually they are not even seeing the cars. That’s my job. I have to watch out for that, and have to keep the dogs safe by having them leashed and keeping them out of traffic. The leash also allows me to protect squirrels, control their interactions with other dogs, and so is not just the law, it’s also a good idea.

If everything there sounds fairly rational and balanced, it’s amazing how impossible it has been at times to have that discussion with people who are into pitbulls.

Let me say that I love pitbulls. I know they can be cute and sweet and loyal. I don’t think I have ever run into any that were not on a leash. I also know that cocker spaniels bite the most, and if there is a problem with the dog it is really the owner. Also, I know that problematic owners are drawn to breeds with bad reputations, and a determined pitbull can do a fair amount of damage based on their jaw strength and tenacity.

This leads us to a state where pitbull owners often feel so beleaguered that you can’t have a rational discussion with them about reasonable restraints and guidelines, because they are so used to hearing slurs against their dogs, and defending their dog is so important to them, that their ears are closed to anything else, where even if you aren’t badmouthing the dog, you are. This is not productive, and yes, it happens because of unreasonable prejudices on the other side, but still, it is not productive.

I feel like we have gotten into a similar state on gun control. People say the same things over and over again, and nothing actually happens, except for people getting hot and bothered either because nothing will happen or because they believe something will happen. We get anger, and rampant stupidity. The only positive is that it is good business for gun sales, and a small economic upsurge inspired by an act of violence and underwritten by paranoia is a lousy gain.

Therefore, trying to say anything meaningful about guns in America seems pointless, but I remain irresistibly drawn to lost causes, so here I go.

More concealed permits are not the answer. If only someone else had a gun at the theater or the mall or the school, or if the battered woman had a gun of her own (apparently the most recent one did). You are overestimating your ability to respond appropriately in a frightening situation.

First of all, you are not fully taking into account the emotional repercussions of getting yourself ready to kill. Yes, if you can save innocent lives by taking out the deranged person, that sounds perfectly reasonable, and it is. Getting yourself mentally in the state where you can do it, though, is not easy, and it shouldn’t be. Obviously it’s easier for some, and that’s a bad thing. Also, even if it was justified and heroic, you will carry baggage from it. Again, that is as it should be, but it’s not something to take lightly, and certainly not to decide as an armchair quarterback.

Secondly, you are overestimating your ability to be accurate and effective. Soldiers and cops have issues with friendly fire all the time, and they get training and practice. Turning an active shooter situation into an open firefight is something that will lead to more injuries, more deaths, and more confusion for first responders, especially if there are multiple armed responders getting into it, where you may end up shooting other good guys. Horrible idea.

Guns don’t kill people, but they make it way easier. Even with all the possibilities for misfiring or just missing, guns are more quick and efficient and more convenient when it is impulsive. If you haven’t heard about Jordan Russell Davis shooting, look that up. No one in their right mind would think playing loud music is worthy of death (Charlie Fuqua’s mind is not right), Michael Dunn’s life was not in danger, and I don’t even believe that he believed that he was in danger, but there is a dead teenager again. There are a lot of issues with law and race and society in that and in the Trayvon Martin case, but cowardly small-minded people are exponentially more dangerous with a gun than without.

If guns are illegal, only criminals will have guns. Perhaps, but they would probably have a harder time getting them, and confiscation would certainly be easier, but there is actually a much more important point here, which is that…

The government is not coming for your guns. I guess there may be an element out there that wants guns to be completely illegal, but really, that’s not the norm. There may be some desired restrictions on certain types of weapons and ammunition (because I don’t think armor-piercing bullets are really integral to freedom), but there’s not a big conspiracy to take all of the guns, and acting like there is just makes you look ignorant. That alone does not make you look as ignorant as proclaiming that the Aurora shooting was a plot by the president so he could justify ramming through anti-gun legislation, but still, listen to what people are saying. Hear them. Assuming everyone is irrationally and wrongly against you is the kind of attitude that makes gun violence more likely.

And I’ll say one other thing on that—I don’t think you are going to see much federal push against guns with a Democrat in office. It’s the old “Only Nixon could go to China” thing. Liberals are supposed to be soft-on-crime pinko wimps, so they don’t touch guns because it would be playing too much to the stereotype.

Honestly, that concerns me more about drug policy than guns, because our drug policy is currently very expensive, wasteful, and deeply flawed, without doing anything to lessen drug use. With guns, honestly, enforcing existing laws might be helpful, there might be some new laws that would be practical, but really, I think it is more important to make it a less hopeless, angry society, with less emphasis on celebrity, and where there is more economic mobility (hope) and better health care including mental. Obviously it is easier to pass new gun laws, but the other route is more useful.

So I remain a crazy dreamer who will not convince anyone not already agreeing with me. I am so used to that. But I will take this opportunity to diverge from the regularly scheduled subject matter to pursue a tangent.

For more Nixon/China reasoning, I believe for a Mormon candidate to be viable it will be necessary to be a Democrat. Voters in general will be concerned about the social conservative issues, and so someone who does not feel the need to legislate the moral behavior of the rest of the country should actually be able to appeal to more voters. And, we LDS Democrats are pretty awesome in my experience.

I love Harry Reid, but I think he’s a little too honey badger to be president, kind of like I don’t expect Joe Biden to run. They’re great, but they fill a different role. That being said, I would love to listen in on the two of them quaffing root beers and trash talking various GOP members. I think that would be a blast.

There was a shooting

I was working on a band review. That may go up tomorrow. As it is, I have been thinking a lot about the Clackamas shooting, and having random thoughts on that. I wrote a lot on it last night, but I will see if I can come up with something coherent here.

I noticed an interesting thing in connection with the shooting. People in other locations wanted to know about Oregon friends and family. They were worried. Here in Oregon, it never occurred to me that anyone I know would be in danger.

Statistically it is much more likely that I would know someone who is affected. I am only twenty-five miles away, and I have been there before, though not often. Even stranger, a while back when I heard someone had been shot at the Thriftway where I have shopped many times, and that is just over a mile away, it still never occurred to me that it would be anyone I knew. I used to run into people I knew all of the time there. As it is, I knew someone who knew the family, and I only knew that because of Facebook.

I think there are a few things going on here. One possible thing is that to have people you care about be far away is scarier, because you can’t really intervene if something does come up. In reality, you can be nearby and not be able to help, but maybe having people near feels safer.

The other thing, and maybe it correlates, is that it is easier to think about the unlikely fears than the likely fears. I am more likely to die in a car crash than a plane crash, but I never think about the car crashing when I get into one, and I do think about plane crashes pretty much every time I board. It’s not an overpowering fear, but I think about it.

Maybe that’s okay, because I don’t fly that often. I get in cars pretty frequently. At the same time, I always wear my seatbelt, and mentally I know that the reason I do that is because of car crashes, but I’m not thinking about that. It’s just a habit, that could potentially protect me someday. The funny thing looking at that is that I am very against doing things mindlessly, and I always want to study things and understand the reasoning behind them and yes, overanalyze them. But it can be so paralyzing to be too aware.

We do need to think about things. The sheriff was talking today about some of the things that helped reduce the death toll. One is that the mall had lockdown procedures in place that worked well. Another is that the police have realized that in a situation like this they cannot wait for SWAT, so they have procedures in place, and they responded very quickly, cutting off free movement for the shooter. Also, other cities helped, and people were good to each other in terms of making good decisions on their own about getting to safety, but also helping others who may have been impaired. I’m glad to hear that.

So this advance planning is important, where you think about things that could happen, and what would mitigate, and you get prepared. I am all about that. Then you need to let it migrate to the back of your mind and live without fear. I’m probably not saying that right, but I’m not even sure if that can be fully explained. Some parts of living you only get with practice.

There’s something that’s making me irritable too, though, so I think tomorrow I’m going to have to write about talking about guns.

Math Rocks

Sometimes there is a nice synchronicity to things. On December 8^th, Ray Toro (lead guitar in My Chemical Romance) replied to a tweet from a fan:

@gerardslaugh: “yOU DESERVE MORE FOLLOWERS. ITS NOT FAIR. 
@raytoro: My happiness isn't based on social media reaction.feel bad 4 those that it is

They’re both right. Inasmuch as there is such a thing as deserving followers, which is debatable, Ray Toro is a reasonable one to follow. He’s an amazing guitarist and he’s affable. Great smile. He doesn’t tweet a lot, but that’s better than overkill.

It was especially relevant to me, because as I was contemplating about the extra love given to lead singers (http://sporkful.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-boys-in-band.html), I started wondering about Twitter followers, and it is totally reflected there. Let’s start off with My Chemical Romance:

My Chemical Romance 483,907
Gerard Way, Lead Vocals – 412,011
Ray Toro, Lead Guitar – 151,689
Mikey Way, Bass – 254,869
Frank Iero, Rhythm Guitar – 223,411

I started tracking the band as well as the members, just to see, and there was more variation here than anywhere else. I think to some extent that is a reflection of how the group account functions. Some do more promotion than others, some make a point of following fans, and some aren’t very active at all. Effectively running a group Twitter account would probably be an interesting area of research with applications that might apply to other creative fields and businesses, but it’s really not something I’m familiar with.

Getting back specifically to band dynamics, as the lead singer, Gerard is the clear winner in terms of follower count, as would be expected. The other band members’ totals are completely respectable. If Ray trails, that may go back to the whole makeup/sexual harassment issue that we touched on in Gossipy.

I did not find any strong correlations between follower counts and instrument played for anyone other than the lead singer. Here we have two bands with wildly different levels of establishment:

The Gaslight Anthem – 63,674
Brian Fallon, Lead Vocals – 36,744
Alexander Rosamilia, Guitar  – 1576
Alex Levine, Bass – 2,317
Benny Horowitz, Drums – 3,122

Weezer – 1,039,209
Rivers Cuomo, Lead Vocals – 853,348
Patrick Wilson, Drums – 16,581
Scott Shriner, Bass – 8,528
Brian Bell – 1911

Let me say about this that all of the others in The Gaslight Anthem tweet way more than Brian Fallon, and when he does tweet it’s mainly random song lyrics. For Weezer, Rivers has not tweeted since July, whereas Patrick and Scott tweet regularly. Content is not an issue so much, except in that Brian Bell would probably have more followers if he did tweet more (and possibly also if his handle had his name rather than his other project’s name).

There were two cases where I thought being the lead singer would not matter as much, and in both cases I was wrong:

Blink 182 - 514,306
Mark Hoppus, Lead Vocals - 2,339,824
Tom Delonge, Guitar - 418,749
Travis Barker, Drums – 1,250,234

Duran Duran – 84,641
Simon Lebon, Lead Vocals – 92,879
John Taylor, Bass – 50,390
Dom Brown, Guitar – 5,714

I was really very surprised here. Well, that the new guitarist for Duran Duran has a significantly smaller following than two of the founding members was not surprising. (Nick, Roger, and Andy do not appear to have accounts.) However, if anyone was going to give the lead singer a run for his money, I thought it would be John Taylor. As it is, Simon has almost double the following. As for Blink, Tom does a lot of vocals, and he fronted his own band, but no, Travis leads significantly. Is there some residual resentment for when they broke up? Really, Tom’s tweets are fine.

The other thing that was quite interesting for me was that I have recently started listening to Fall Out Boy, and it occurred to me that this might be one where the lead singer was not the frontman, because you just hear so much about Pete Wentz. Looking up “frontman” on Wikipedia, they listed that as an example of the exception to the rule, so that made me feel smart, but also, check out the numbers:

Fallout Boy 230,299
Pete Wentz, Bass – 2,573,428
Patrick Stump, Lead Vocals – 164,239
Andy Hurley, Drums – 20,135
Joe Trohman, Guitar – 55,008

Surely the follower numbers don’t lie. Pete Wentz is the frontman. Moving past that, though, the singer does have a significant edge over the rest of the band, so despite the exception, the rule is still felt.

Now, I actually collected a lot more My Chemical Romance stats than are posted above, because I was thinking about both former members and touring members. I’ve got three former drummers and a touring drummer, but the touring keyboardist does not have a verified account. It’s an unusual spelling, so I think it probably is him, but he’s not really tweeting.

I’m actually not going to touch on former members, because that’s really a minefield. Whether they leave on good terms or not, there may be perceptions that skew how the fans of the band will react. However, we can get some interesting data on touring members by looking at the other band I follow, because, hey, I want to get them in here somewhere:

All American Rejects – 106,133
Tyson Ritter, Lead Vocals – 77,612
Nick Wheeler, Lead Guitar – 21,726
Mike Kennerty, Rhythm Guitar – 17,515
Chris Gaylor, Drums – 1,642

Matt Rubano, Bass, touring - 9721
Scott Chesak, Keyboards, touring – 1316

We do have another exception in here with the main group, in that Chris has an account, and he does not use it. That’s fine. I have this weird feeling that he would hate tweeting, and I don’t want him to feel any pressure for that. If he did, I’m sure he would be in about the same range as Nick and Mike. Obviously with the touring members it is much lower, and some of Matt’s following may come from his time in Taking Back Sunday. (Actually, he does a lot of stuff, including giving bass lessons. He’s pretty cool.)

So, is there a point to all of this other than me getting something stuck in my head and obsessing?  Possibly.

The first point is that even though I have conceded that there are valid reasons for the favoring of the frontmen, and that it is reasonable, I still do not approve. If I love a band’s music, I love them, and I want to know about them and appreciate them. Following them on Twitter is great. You get an idea of their humor, you get good suggestions of other bands for listening (again, Frank Iero and Mike Kennerty are great for this), and often you get to see pictures of their pets. Good times. I guess I will do some #FF suggestions this Friday on people I think should be followed. It will be futile, but I will do it anyway.

The other point is that it has nothing to do with what anyone deserves. Certainly musical taste is personal, but also, a lot of it is merely who is on Twitter, and how they use it. This group may include people with a lot of time on their hands and underdeveloped tastes related to their relative maturity. I think I can illustrate this with two more figures.

Taylor Swift – 21,614,256
Justin Bieber – 31,212,420

Clearly there is no point in deciding worth based on Twitter followings. It’s an interesting phenomenon, but that’s all it is.

There was one other thing that I started wondering though, on the topic of frontmen, because there are some—I don’t even like calling them bands—where the front may be less obvious. Wikipedia came through again by giving me the names of the members of One Direction, because I didn’t know, and I intend to forget them after this:

One Direction - 8,371,842
Harry Styles – 8,730,862
Niall Horan – 8,132,324
Liam Payne – 7,542,747
Louis Tomlinson – 7,523,393
Zayn Malik – 6,912,374

I guess if there is a front it’s Harry. I think he’s dating Taylor Swift, though by the time I post he could just be the start of a song about their breakup. I feel a little bad for Zayn. In New Kids on the Block terms, he must be the Danny. (It was Danny, right? I didn’t like boy bands then either.)

Regardless, this has NOTHING to do with what is deserved.

The boys in the band

"No matter how young and good looking the bass player is, chicks always dig the lead singer." (My Name is Earl, Season 2, Episode 5 "Van Hickey")

I have been thinking a lot about dynamics inside the band. It is true that the lead singer gets the lion’s share of the attention. At times I have felt bad about that.

I have especially felt sorry for drummers because in so many groups they seem to be so disposable. Maybe it’s only in Spinal Tap where they spontaneously combust, but even in the real world they get fired a lot, and there are statistically more jokes about them than about other band members, even to the characterization of Animal in the Muppets. Yes, he is well-loved, but everyone else in the Electric Mayhem speaks in complete sentences.

Apparently the next worst-self esteem tends to belong to bass players. I was surprised to hear this, but it makes sense. Their playing does not get as fancy as the people with six strings on their guitars. Those flourishes and solos don’t really happen. Often, they are the least skilled guitarist, and that’s how they end up on bass. There. I said it. (Now I feel like I should be smitten with snapped strings.)

I would expect keyboard players to get a lot of flack, but so many bands don’t even have them anymore, or they’re just touring ones, not really in the band. I feel worst for them. I felt so guilty when I realized that Matt would need to die in the screenplay. Sure—just kill the touring bass player! That is so typical; they’re the redshirts of the band!

(That’s why I am so glad that as a character his personality is divergng so much from real Matt. It assuages the guilt a bit.)

Okay, back in my day (the late Cretaceous) it was not always easy to get all of the information on a band, and the lead singer did most of the interviewing, and so he was the one you knew. There’s no excuse now. There’s Wikipedia, and Twitter, and what do I find? Amazing differences in the ratio of followers for the frontman and the backers. And it is pretty much always the lead singer. There was one notable exception, but the numbers will be in a separate post for tomorrow—a post that makes me wish more than ever that I had taken statistics.

Today I want to focus on why it is wrong, but first I should acknowledge what works well with it. In many cases part of the lead singer’s job is to deflect unwanted attention from the other members of the band. There are people up there sometimes who are just trying not to throw up, and being able to be in the background is a relief. The upside of the lead singer being more likely to be mauled by a deranged fan is that the safety for everyone else is improved. I get that.

The lead singer’s job is to sell the band up on stage, and to bring the audience in. That’s what’s been missing at some concerts. Whether he is flirting or seducing or palling around, that is the connection. The charisma becomes as important as the voice, and lead singers tend to have charmisa in spades, and they are the ones singing those amazing words, whether they wrote them or not, so of course we swoon for them.

However, it just wouldn’t be as cool with him up there singing a capella. There is so much that the rest of the band contributes, and for which they should be acknowledged. Often things work together so much as part of the ensemble that individual instruments don’t stand out, but if you could listen ot any of your favorite songs with key tracks removed, you’d see. And, there are always some standouts.

Okay, maybe keyboards aren’t as much en vogue since the synth pop heyday of the ‘80s, but it doesn’t change what “Take on Me” meant to me then, or really everything by A-ha. You know, “Rocking the Casbah” by the Clash started out as that piano track, and then filled in around that, and it works. It’s still infectious now.

Think about the drums on “Sugar We’re Going Down”, by Fall Out Boy, or “Welcome to the Black Parade” by My Chemical Romance, or “Till I Hear It From You” by the Gin Blossoms. Drums give punctuation, and momentum, and they create great biceps! And drummers are the most likely to respond to you personally.

Think about “Blister in the Sun” by Violent Femmes. It wouldn’t even exist without that bassline. Think about how the bass shapes Gang of Four. Bass is what brings the sexy into the song. That’s not just a voice thing. Perhaps this is why some bass players manage to be so confident, and sexy. (Special thanks to John Taylor, Mikey Way, and Matt Rubano.)

Think about that driving guitar in “Saturday Night” by the Misfits. Yes it is combined with powerful vocals and demented lyrics, but I have heard it acoustic and it is just not the same. It’s not a coincidence that so many of my favorite bands have both lead and rhythm guitar—that’s power there! That’s not even mentioning that bridge in “Summertime”. I had written about how it haunted me, and then I decided I had made peace with it, but no, I had a dream about where I was still trying to find out what made it so special. (And that one works both acoustic and regular.) Actually, my love for guitar is pretty well-documented. Oh, and “Great Expectations” by The Gaslight Anthem! Have you heard the guitar on that chorus?

So Earl is completely right, and frankly, for that particular episode it was for the best, but I think maybe a better quote would come from the movie Drumline, as the different section leaders are pumping up their sections, even though that’s a different kind of band:

"Trumpets are the voice of the band. We are the melody. We are the clarity."

"Tubas are the most important section in the band, boy. Tubas are the boom."

"Saxophones are the truth, the funk and the hook."

"We are the heart and the soul. Without the percussionists, the band doesn’t move, doesn’t come alive. We are the pulse. Without a pulse, you’re dead. That’s why we’re the most important section of the band!"

I don’t know what they told the piccolos and flutes, but whatever it was, they’re right. We need them all.

Jersey Boys

This is only tangentially related to the musical, but I will hit on that.

I have this hypothesis (I haven’t put enough time into it to call it a theory) that music is better under Republican presidents, because times are worse, and sensitive people put their pain into art. I believe the glorious blossoming of pop in the ‘80s was due largely to a combination of Reagonomics and Thatcherism. You would think given my love of music I would vote Republican more, but I’m not a masochist and anyway, I can always go back and listen to music from worse times.

Where I am going with this is that in the last year I have become aware that New Jersey has been a pretty reliable source of good music and influential music. Yes, obviously that started with listening to My Chemical Romance, but then I am also listening to The Gaslight Anthem and Revenir, and I saw the musical Jersey Boys, and hey, Bruce Springsteen, and the Misfits, and Bon Jovi! They’ve got a lot going on.

At the same time, as I learn more about these bands, New Jersey sounds like an increasingly horrible place. I know television shows set in Jersey are a big thing now, but I haven’t watched any of them, and nothing makes me want to. However, just reading about the Misfits, or watching Life on the Murder Scene and multiple MCR members were not allowed to play outside because of dead bodies turning up, and that one scene in Jersey Boys with the apparent murder and extortion plot, which seems to have no purpose other than to show you that hey, this is a horrible place!

So it’s interesting from that perspective, though now I feel a little scared to criticize it, plus, no matter what these musicians admit about their growing up years, they still seem to have a lot of loyalty to their home state, and I get that. I know what people say about Aloha, and I kind of get what they are saying, but also they are wrong and should just suck it.

The other thing that it takes me back to, though, is my History of the Pacific Northwest Class, taken Spring term, 1992, at University of Oregon, and taught by Professor Richard Maxwell Brown. (His fall and winter classes focused on the Old West.) Anyway, I remember him talking about how place influences design and art. One example is that we have more pointed roofs here than in other drier parts of the country because rain falls, and you want that rain to drain off the roof. He also suggested that there was a Northwest Sound in music, and that it was influenced by rain as well.  

I admit, I did not hear it. Maybe he needed to play some songs for us where the patterns were detectable. At the same time, I was trying to think of local music, and all I could remember was Quarterflash and Nu Shooz, and of course there is a much broader scene than that. He did talk about how the economy of Aberdeen, Washington would have contributed to the sound of Nirvana, and I know that fans who have made pilgrimages there have backed up everything Professor Brown said.

Maybe part of the problem is that I didn’t know enough Northwest music. Looking at my favorite bands before, not only was there no one local, there was no real geographic pattern. They were from Norway, New Zealand, Queens, London, Tempe, and Austin. Usually, there isn’t even anyone from the same place for comparison. (Yes, I could find other Austin bands, I am sure, but I didn’t know any then, and everyone else I can think of from Queens is rap.)

Even if I was not sure that he was right, it did make an impression, and I would think of it at odd times. For example, a while back I was browsing at Powell’s and there was a book about the Clash, but it was proposing that rock and roll was influenced by the sound of trains running, and the rhythm of that, because it came from poor people who lived near the tracks (on the wrong side, I assume), and so that noise was the background of their life. Well, maybe.

Certainly economic factors and geographic factors could influence a band. Also, as people listen to each other on the club scene, there may be influences there. I remember I was listening to this one band on Soundcloud and while they were black metal, so not really my thing, there was something about the sound of the guitars that reminded me of Revenir. I wanted to listen again to figure it out, but I can’t find them. I thought the name was Black Nuns or something. Dead Nuns? I was pretty sure it was nuns, but I don’t get any hits when I search on it.

So is there a New Jersey sound? And is it a sound of rebellion and despair? Is that why Erik Rutan is so angry? I have no idea. If that is the case, I guess I am grateful for their sacrifice, and worried about those who are not musical. Is that when you turn into a Guido? When you are tone-deaf? Seriously, I have no idea. Mainly I just keep finding out that there is more to learn, and more to know, and most of all to always be grateful for punk rock. Well, rock in general, but especially punk.

So I don’t necessarily hear rain drops in Everclear, or Sir Mixalot, but I am willing to listen again.

(And please, I hope no one in Jersey is offended, and that if you are you realize that killing me would only be conforming to the harmful stereotypes that lead to this kind of post.)

The scariest fan in the world

I have really mixed feelings about this one, because in some ways it feels important and in other ways it feels unfair. This is ultimately a real person, and recognizable, and so I feel some guilt about holding her out there as a laughingstock, but I’m not laughing, even if there are humorous elements, and I do think there may be some important points here.

So, the way I am getting around my guilt is that I am posting this today, and I am not identifying the concert, and I will use initials in place of names for the people involved, and I am not going to start writing about the concerts for a few days, giving some distance. It will still not be that hard to figure out which concert and band it was, but it feels like a compromise I can live with, so that’s what I’m doing.

After the opening act, we noticed her talking to the people next to us. She was probably in her mid-to-late forties (I am not great at estimating age), but what really struck us was her waist-length mullet. Combined with the fanny pack and her manner of dress, it kind of looked like she was stuck in 1992, and had possibly stopped cutting her hair then.

She was telling them how she follows the band to different shows and she showed them her tattoo of the lead singer’s signature on her arm, and the tambourine she had gotten at one of their shows. R, the lead singer, plays the tambourine. I knew that, but I had never seen them live before, so I did not know he gave them out. I have known many people to get picks and drumsticks before, so that’s cool that he does that.

During the course of the show he gave out at least three, and I wondered if that would make her value hers less, but she was waving it at him from the front, and at the end she caught a drumstick, and she was waving the stick and the tambourine together at the drummer. Look at me!

So, it was a great show, and we were buzzed from that, but I was thinking about her, and disturbed, and talking with J and A I was saying that it was sad and scary, because clearly her love for this band is how she feels special, and I worry that someday loving them and following them won’t be enough, and that she will try and stab R. And they laughed, but also acknowledged that it wasn’t completely a joke.

Where the plot thickened was that we were too adrenalized to go to sleep, so we went to the deli to get some snacks and hang out, and who should walk in but the drummer, S! And who should latch on to him but Superfan!

I would have gone up to talk to him anyway, but I admit to having an ulterior motive of seeing if maybe I could help provide a distraction. Like maybe she would gracefully cede the floor, and he would be safe. That is not how it went down. I did talk to S, and he was very gracious, and tired, but she waited throughout, and while he ordered, and while he was waiting for his food, and after he got his food.

We watched this, having our own conversations, but also keeping an eye on them. Honestly, S was being great with her. If he had not specifically told me he was wiped out, it would have been easy to know. Giving a rock concert is hard work. Drums are hard work, and it was late, and from his body language it was clear he was tired and hungry, but he was patient and considerate and I admire him for that. It was just tainted by how less than an hour ago we had been talking about her stabbing R someday in the future. I don’t want him stabbed!

Yes, we were mostly joking. We kind of could because we don’t really think she is there yet, so it felt at that point like a matter of being annoyed, not being in danger. I said the best way to get out of it would be to look behind her, point saying “Look, there’s R!” and then run. (Unless R was actually in that direction. Then it would not be cool.)

So, we had our mean laughs, I guess, but I don’t feel mean or amused—I feel sad. I feel sad that she apparently has so little of a life, and that it could put someone in danger. I don’t want bands to have to be afraid and close themselves off from fans. As a fan, I love meeting them. If I get to do it enough, I might even be able to have an encounter that’s not embarrassing at some point.

I guess it ultimately comes down to the kind of society we have. I think there is probably mental illness there, probably with some depression, and not a lot of options for a fulfilling life, so it gets subverted into this fantasy life. We use “pathetic” as a criticism but its root is that this is something sad, and there is something sad there, with a whole web of related factors.

Perhaps first is care for the mentally ill, which is largely neglected, but we think of that in terms of people who definitely need meds or possibly even hospitalization. What about people who are born into an increasingly less mobile society, and retreat into fantasy because there’s seemingly nothing for them in reality? What about people who go into schools that are so underfunded that they never learn any means of creative expression or any reason to develop any kinds of aspirations?

I’m not saying that that there is no role of personal choice, and that there aren’t people who could still do a lot better with what they have, despite not having much. One of the great inspirations in life is finding people who overcame difficulties where it would seem very reasonable to give up, and yet they didn’t. I get that; I just think we should quit making things so hard that large percentages of the population need to be heroes just to survive. How about making survival easier, and then let the heroes use those abilities for grander things?

I know; there she goes again! Yes, I do, because that’s the way I am, and even though I do not share everything that I see or read, there is a lot that works together and it keeps making my heart softer and my desire for better greater, and I don’t think that’s going to change. But I swear in this case it all started with a simple thought of “Wow! That is some mullet there.”

Musical Miscellany

There have been a few things going on that I have not necessarily understood, but have found interesting, so I am just going to throw them out there for your perusal.

One was that I had two songs separately that I found myself needing to listen to about three times a day. Specifically, they were “Astro Zombies” by My Chemical Romance and “Great Expectations” by The Gaslight Anthem. I didn’t necessarily get the craving to listen to them at the same times, but once I realized that I was in the same spot with both of them, I did start listening to them together just for efficiency’s sake.

In this case, I believe the issue was that I just needed to make both songs a part of me, where I was familiar enough with them that I could mentally bring them up any time I wanted. That is actually pretty common for me, though usually it happens shortly after I hear a new song. What was unusual in this case was that it was two songs at about the same time, and both ones that I had heard some time previously. “Great Expectations” I liked immediately, but not obsessively, and I don’t remember “Astro Zombies” making a strong impression on me at all. I guess I fell in love with both, but on a delayed reaction.

The other phenomenon was that I got two phantom fragments of other songs in my heads, again at around the same time. They were both songs that I knew, and yet somehow, divorced from context, I could not immediately place them. This was new for me, and it was a little scary because after reading Musicophilia, I was more aware of all the weird things your brain can do, and how it can take something you love and turn it into torture. I wasn’t there yet, but I was worried.

I did have ideas about where they were from, and eventually I was able to work backwards and trace both of them to their origins. One fragment was the violin part from “Falling Apart” by the All-American Rejects, and the other was the ending passage on S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W, by My Chemical Romance. Both are a little more orchestral in nature (if that makes sense), which may be what made them stand out. For right now, what I am taking from it is that they are both lovely in their own right, and while they fit into their respective songs, maybe it is also good to give them some unique appreciation. It’s as good an answer as any.

The other mystery is that after having been to concerts of bands I really like recently, and in both cases having forgotten to bring ear plugs (we are normally very responsible about protecting our hearing), in both cases the lead singers’ voices seemed higher-pitched to me than I am used to from the recordings.

In the case of the Gin Blossoms, more time has passed since their last release, where the voice could have changed, but for the All-American Rejects, Kids in the Street is pretty recent, so that’s not it. So then I am wondering if they sing differently in live performance than in the studio, or if me being used to having ear plugs in makes it seem different when I don’t (I had not seen either band live before), or if I am just crazy. There may be a more quantifiable answer to this one than the others, but I honestly don’t know.

So, those are some things that I have been thinking about musically, and that seems like a good place to start as I move into another section of blogging about music. I will be writing about the concerts I have seen recently, and new bands that are following me on Twitter, and things that I find interesting about band dynamics.

I am not done with my exploration of the guitar comments yet. Part of it is that I realize I will never be done. For one thing, I keep finding more information. Rolling Stone doesn’t just have a list of the 100 Greatest Guitar songs of all time; they also have the 100 Greatest Guitarists, and there are comments there too, and I don’t know that I am committed to checking out all of those the way I am with the song comments, but I was at least thrilled to see that Robert Johnson made this list, and that someone finally mentioned the glaring omission of Django Reinhardt. Fine, he didn’t play rock, but he influenced many people who did make the list, he mastered the guitar, twice, and doing it after the injury made him more of an inspiration to others, including Tommy Iommi.

Actually, I probably think rankings like this are stupid, but then they become interesting starting points for me. Just from the comments on the songs, I have 46 bands left to listen to, and I felt kind of bad about that, and then my list of books to read was growing, and movies to see, and so that doesn’t feel like much has been accomplished, but then I reversed how I was looking at it.

I have listened to about 129 different bands – sometimes only one song, usually more. Many were completely new to me. Some are starred because I want to get back to them. I have read three books that I had been meaning to read. One of the others I started, and I realized that I needed to go through it slowly, listening to different songs along the way, so I bought a copy, and I can do that.

(I’m doing horribly on the movies. There’s no excuse for it.)

So, there have been many thoughts, and there will be many more thoughts. I have written a lot. I will write more. And there will always be more to know. So many cool things to find.

Oh, there is one other thing I am doing that is kind of interesting. I guess it has been two years since I wrote this Christmas song, and last year I kind of felt like I should do something with it, and didn’t, and I started feeling that way again. I think next year I will animate a music video for it, and post it on Youtube. Remember, I need to allow myself a lot of time to accomplish things.

This year I am just singing it every day. I have a melody in my head, but it is not as concrete as when you actually put it out there, so I am fine-tuning that. I am also starting to make some minor tweaks to the lyrics, and I may make bigger changes to the order. One habit that I picked up over the last few years is making the chorus different each time it is repeated. This makes the songs harder to memorize, and it seems like a bad habit, but I do it a lot. One more motive for frequent practice.

It’s a stretch because this one was actually written for a female voice, and it has been super fun because lately I have had a cold and my throat is all rough. Still, it’s interesting, because I haven’t done this for a long time. Don’t get me wrong; there is a lot that would need to happen to have a music video that I could be satisfied with a year from now, and part of that may be finding another singer, and if it needs instrumentation, and how to manage that if there does.

I have no idea, but one step of getting ready to make my own film is working with shorts, like a three minute video, and I want to be able to record my family in Italy when we go see them, so I need to be looking at recording equipment anyway (maybe a TASCAM; I will take recommendations) and it just all works together. From a creative point of view it is fulfilling, and also it just seems like the world is full of possibilitites, and anything can happen. I like that.

For right now the main thing is that tonight I’m going to go see the Killers.

Technology bits and pieces

If you will recall, the last real update about the comic book was that I had finally found a place to upload a pdf, but that I’d had a really hard time doing so, and had signed up with about five other services before getting there, frying my brain in the process.

The site I used was freepdfhosting.com, which is fine, but is is only good for 30 days, so that link is expired. I knew I would get back to the other sites, and I have some updates on that. Here’s a breakdown:

Dropbox: This one may be the most promising for sharing files, specifically pdfs. It may also be great for remote backup purposes. I’ve got to say that it also seems the least interesting to work with. However, it comes fairly well recommended, and it may serve two distinct needs, so I will have to check it out.

Tumblr: I have no idea how to use this effectively. It seems like a good way to combine tweeting and blogging and to do a lot more with animated gifs and things, but visually it kind of reminds me of my initial bad reaction to MySpace. I do occasionally find things I like there, but it is more likely to be because I linked to it from somewhere else, rather than my finding it directly through Tumblr. My next step here has been checking my Tumblr feed every day for a week, and then trying to customize my site, so it at least links to my blogs or tweets or something. So far I am a horrible failure with it. Maybe this one is more for the kids.

Ficwad: This is a site for uploading fan fiction. It seemed like a good place to upload the comic book. I created an account and went through the uploading process twice and nothing happened. Giving it some time and going back, I realized this was because I was trying to upload a pdf file, and it only takes text and html files. Silly me!

The great news is that Final Draft can be saved as text and html, as well as a pdf. So I went though the upload process again, and got a confirmation message, and I actually had a story link that you could click on, but then there was nothing there when you clicked on it. So, I tried it again, ending up with three empty links.

Trying again, this time I decided to split it into chapters. There was another site where that seems to be pretty common, and I was thinking of going back there, and you can actually click on the link for Summertime, and see the chapter. The layout isn’t great, but it’s something:

http://www.ficwad.com/story/207074

Actually, there were at least two other fan sites that I was looking at. Well, I think it was three, but I can’t remember how many I signed up for. The one focused more on slash, which mine is clearly not, and I probably won’t get back to that. I guess when the site admin’s name starts with “Assmaster” it may be a subtle hint.

I feel embarrassed with all of the fan fiction sites, but still, if I want more people to read it, a fan fiction site makes sense. Right now I think I will stick with Ficwad, because I have actually made some progress, and then perhaps try with other sites later. There is only so much time in a day, and I have a major illustrating project that I want done by the 15^th, plus I would like to finish the current screenplay no later than Wednesday, and I still have the job that actually earns some money.

Now, let’s talk about the chapters on Ficwad, and the original post on freepdfhosting. Some friends had started reading it, but no one has finished it, even though some will eventually, because it is too long. That’s something that makes the chapters look more practical.

I had already broken it down into 25-page sections for the drawing part anyway. Now I am going to release it as a continuing story, with a cliff-hanger kind of thing going on. I should totally make it so that part two is released on December 21^st, because it happens on the 21^st, and that will be eerie. Well, actually the second part ends on the December 21^st, 2012 but is mainly taking place in 2019. Part 3 picks up right where the second part left off, then deals with the initial aftermath for Jane, then starts Mikey’s flashback for the early post-flares period in Greenvale. Maybe that should go out on the 21^st.

The good news from the feedback that I do have is that people were not bothered by reading in the screenplay format. I was worried about that. At least two people found the transition from the prologue to the 2019 present abrupt. It had not occurred to me at all when I was writing it, but I think that works out. I mean, every character in the story has been through at least one abrupt life change. So going from that sweet innocence with just a tiny hint of foreshadowing of the first seven pages, to that seemingly unrelated harsh and dangerous landscape that appears on page 8, to the reveal of the connection between both on page 10, may be the best way of building sympathy between the characters and the reader. It raises questions, but those questions start getting answered at a pretty good pace.

I think I mentioned earlier that I was posting some Facebook status updates and tweets related to the new screenplay, so let’s talk about that. Some of it is probably just my boundless need for attention and validation, but there were a few other things that went into it.

One was that several people were voicing exhaustion with all of the political posts. I was told by many of these people that they didn’t mean me, and I can kind of guess about the ugliness that some people would have been seeing, and how incessant it could be. Anyway, I realized that I needed to make a point of posting other things. Instead of just posting interesting news articles when I found them, look for cute videos, and post updates about what I am doing.

I had been really good about that when I first got onto Facebook. Maybe when I got to where I was writing so much, and expressing so much through the blog I started neglecting that. However, people may often be better able to read a quick sentence than a blog post. Anyway, it reminded me to remember to share, and there’s not always really a lot going on in my life, but sometimes when I am writing I get a funny line, or an interesting dilemma.

Also, I am moving more towards being seriously career-minded. Okay, I am still not actively looking for an agent, but those things are getting closer, and so it makes sense to kind of keep it out there more. Hey, I write. I have a creative mind. I am familiar with screenwriting. It’s like pre-networking. I am not actively networking yet, but I am working more on projecting that image.

That means that one of the other things I am going to explore soon is completely reworking my LinkedIn profile so that it reflects the kind of work that I want to do, not what I do. I’m not looking for another tech or insurance job—I have that covered.

I do realize that a lot of my issues with uploading pdfs would be quickly resolved by just building my own web site, but I am not really motivated to do that right now. I would be rusty. It’s been a while since I have messed with that stuff, and a lot of my choices right now are based on effective use of time. I don’t want to become a web designer. I don’t really want to promote myself that much as a person, but that might be a key component of what I do want to do, which is being a working writer. So, those are the factors that I need to balance.

Dark Social

That sounds ominous, doesn’t it?

There were some interesting milestones that happened on Thanksgiving Day. My main blog got it’s 10000^th hit, and I was actually able to catch it right when the counter was exactly at 10000, so that was cool. Also, I sent my 1000^th tweet (my 666^th happened on Halloween), and I gained my 50^th follower.

That all of those nice even decimal numbers happened on the same day, and a holiday, is cool, and it is absolutely not something that I could have planned, because seriously, I have no idea how any of this happens. Like, with the Twitter followers, since then it has swung up to 54, and down to 47, despite having a new follower. I  have no idea why. That’s what makes this a good time to talk about dark social.

I read an article about this in The Atlantic on October 12^th:

http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2012/10/dark-social-we-have-the-whole-history-of-the-web-wrong/263523/

If you are interested in this sort of thing, the article is worth reading, but to briefly sum up, not all web traffic can be tracked. Some visitors come from Facebook, any web page, maybe not even  social networking, and you can run data on that. If I bookmark the page and return or memorize the URL and type it in, that cannot be tracked. And for the social part, which probably accounts for a lot of web traffic, if you send e-mail with the link to friends, or share it in a chat window, then there is no referring URL, and the source is unknown. It is the web traffic equivalent of dark matter. We know it’s there, but that’s about all we know.

Shortly after starting the blog I added a hit counter. Some time later it broke, and I switched to using Google Analytics instead. Around July of 2010, Blogger itself started tracking hits on individual posts, and there is a Stats option where I can check referring sites and search terms, which is pretty similar to what Analytics gets me. I still check Analytics sometimes, mainly because if someone is using a longer search term, Analytics will show more characters.

The point is that I always want to know what hits I am getting and I would like to know whom and how and why. In reality, I don’t see the source of most of it. Much of what I do see is not logical. Some of the referral sites don’t really seem to link to me, and honestly, I’m not sure how a link would fit in on some of those pages, like the Korean Art Gallery, or the page with all the butt shots.

Sometimes I can see sense in it, like when I started getting hits on “A Guide to your Parent’s Knee Surgery”. I know how I felt when my mother’s knees were done, and how my thoughts were spinning when I was going through it; that’s why I wrote it. If some family was passing it around in e-mail, I get it, and I hope it helped.

Some make less sense. “Task: Exfoliate and Condition Hair” getting passed around makes no sense. There is no helpful information there, but suddenly it got over twenty hits last month, with no obvious reason why. “80’s fashion victim” is more reasonable, because if you lived through that time period, you relate, and you know people who relate.

People choosing to follow me on Twitter is even more mystifying, but sometimes there appear to be connections. In “Don’t Get Mad. Really” I mention the site Twitchy and Michelle Malkin, with whom it is affiliated. When I first posted it, I got a follower with Michelle Malkin as one of his interests. For a while, I had two super conservatives following me. (The other was something about choosing between Obama and America.) At one point they both dropped off, and I thought, well, I guess I can quit being paranoid.

Recently that post suddenly started getting hits again, without any obvious searches or referrals, and now I have another conservative follower. I assume they are monitoring me in hopes of ridiculing me at some point, or something like that. It could be from that Papa John’s thing. Whatever.

Honestly, I don’t know why anyone would follow me on Twitter. Mainly I just post my blog updates, which you could just as easily get by following the blogs, and then sometimes I reply to things other people are posting. Also, sometimes I can tell that the people I follow are bored, and then I will try and post more to ameliorate the situation, but I don’t feel like I am very helpful on that.

I am getting followed a lot by bands lately, which was surprising. At first I thought it was that my strong position on the importance of paying for music was giving me some popularity. In many cases, it is clearly aspiring bands trying to get more followers, which makes sense, but I am curious about how they choose people to follow.

Anyway, I do eventually listen to all of them, and I intend to review all of them via the blog as well, though depending on how fast the number grows, it may not be practical. Then there are ones where they maybe only have three songs available now, and I wonder how I can review that, and then I think, finally, a short post! That will be great.

Ultimately, I have to accept not knowing, and really, it’s not like having the page hit really means that someone read the whole post—they could come, decide the layout is ugly, and bounce, and I won’t know. (Unless there are comments. You have no idea how I long for comments!)

It is really only a curiosity issue. Even if I find that there are some topics that are more popular, I’m still going to write what I have in me to write. That’s not going to change. I like seeing a lot of hits, and I feel bad when there are posts that were really good but no one is reading. (Why does “There are some things money can’t buy” have 170 hits and “Geek = Joy” only has 13? How is that fair?) Going over this is a good reminder. Once I put it out there, it’s out there, and if no one needs it now, but will in the future, it will still be there. Embracing uncertainty seems to go along with embracing chaos. I can live without knowing.

However, if I have a sudden spike in bands following me, I am going to assume that’s connected to this post and the promise of me reviewing them. Currently there are seven in line ahead of you, not counting the seven related to the concerts I’ve been too. I can probably have everyone covered over the next two months.