Monday, February 27, 2017

So not finished

There are some important milestones coming up this week.

Wednesday is the anniversary of my year of selfies. Technically, the 365th one gets taken Tuesday, but I will certainly post a selfie Wednesday and write something about that project.

Saturday, March 4th, will be a year since my last day of work. It wasn't the day I found out about the layoff, and it wasn't the last day of pay because the severance lasted for another two months, but March 4th is the day that sticks.

At one point when working on these many, many things to improve myself, I had decided to target March 1st for completion, which seemed possible if not easy. Yeah, that's not going to happen.

Some of that completion includes treating in the blog, and that could have been more possible if I had only blogged about that and nothing else, but I don't regret the tangents. They go along with everything. I don't know how many people read every post, but they build on each other. That could make some posts less accessible to new readers. I don't mean to do that, but I am aware of the connections between things and try to explore that in a clear and logical way. And that wouldn't be helped by significantly longer posts, so I spread things out.

This has been a hard year, but there have been good things in it, and I hope more good things will come from it. I also know that completion is a loaded term. As I deal with some things, I can see other issues that have not been dealt with, and possible ways of dealing with that, but that maybe aren't for right now. I never expected to come out of it completely perfect.

The need for constant work has been brought home a bit more recently. I had struggled, and gotten to a point where I felt like I was doing really well, where "serene" could be a reasonable adjective for me, and then all of a sudden it wasn't. I am in another adjustment period, coping with this new phase, and adapting to it.

And life goes on.

So there will be lots of deep and heartfelt and funny and pathetic things to write about over at least another month, and even when that is done the writing will go on. If you are wondering what topics have not been covered yet (which items are still marked in red on the spreadsheet), I am including that information - categorized - down below:

Disconnected from Body
I don't believe I can be loved
Can't drive
Bad feelings about Dad
Shoulders ache
Feel burdened

Be connected to body
See good in myself
Have flying dreams
Be financially secure
Not have loneliness be a problem
Be okay with appearance

To Do
Meet physical needs
Moderate changes
Create comics for other works
Work on family history
Complete contacting singles
Transcribe mission journal
Bridgestone course
Other driving classes

Cinderella At My Daughter
The Beauty Myth
The Feminine Mystique
Packaging Girlhood

Also, as new things To Do became apparent in the course of the work, two things were added that remain glaring at me in red.


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