Bon Jovi

There are a few song choices where I was not sure whether I should use them, for one reason or another.  Would using "The Holy City" seem pro-Israel? There is blackface use in The Jazz Singer and traditionally in Aida (though we always listened to the Leontyne Price version).

And Jon Bon Jovi was a cheater.

I was never a huge fan, but I liked the band okay. 

I know people who loved the band and the singer; many of them were really upset about the cheating. They always thought he was a good guy.

(A lot of people took a similar journey with Dave Grohl.)

The way rock goes, a lot of songs might suddenly be ineligible if I looked too hard at that, but yes, he is a cheater and a lot of this musical reverie is about the pain caused by cheating.

It still felt like a good fit for a few reasons.

Going back in time, after the last time my aunt visited us here (rather than us going to her), she mentioned that in Italy she would hear "Wanted Dead Or Alive" and she would miss us then.

(MTV played a lot in our house, and she would have heard it a lot.)

Yesterday I mentioned Mom liking our music; she did, and to a large extent our aunt did too. There were two exceptions, where Mom tended to agree with her.

It's an important distinction that most of her exposure was coming through videos, not the radio. It was definitely the videos that she held against Prince and David Lee Roth: "Disgraziato" and "Pazzoide" ("disgrace" and "crazy man"). 

I'm pretty sure it was "Goin' Crazy" for Roth (the chaps were definitely an issue), but I am not sure for Prince. Maybe "Kiss."

Apparently her memories of Bon Jovi were good. 

The band was approached about using "Wanted Dead Or Alive" in Young Guns II, but they felt it didn't really fit. That led to Jon Bon Jovi's first solo album, Blaze of Glory, with songs inspired by the movie. 

In my first year of college, while Dad still wasn't speaking to me and money was a huge concern, "Miracle" off of that album played in my head a lot.

That rift put additional stress on my parents' marriage. One specific thing is that, after I left for college, he wanted to turn my room into an office, getting rid of my bed and things, and she wouldn't let him.

Having been working for a few years, standing up to him was easier, but that doesn't mean it didn't have a cost.

I have felt guilt about that, but I am not sure I was capable of handling it differently. 

I don't think he actually meant to cast me off. I think it was supposed to break me so that I would grovel and become completely compliant. My mind didn't even work that way; I thought when someone rejected you there was nothing you could do except try and move on.

When I was in Eugene, feeling worried and without options, that phrase kept coming back to me: "Gonna take a miracle, to save us this time, and your savior has just left town."

Somehow I made it through. I got my Bachelors many years ago, and I am working on my Masters now. 

That's two significant Bon Jovi memories there, but the song I ended up using was "Livin' On A Prayer" for January 17th, my birthday. 

As far as I know, it's one of only two songs with a "Gina" in them. The Johnny Mathis one is pretty corny, about how kissing her was so wonderful. Mom had told me about the song, and it made her smile having a daughter with that name, but "Livin' On A Prayer" sounds more like my life, especially then: working hard, holding on, and surviving. 

The cheater was still a big part of our lives, even though he doesn't define us, and I do still love him.