Monday, April 22, 2013

My dream guitar: A story in three parts

I have written about dreams and interpretations before, with the most recent being about how the Family Blood story came about, and the most general and analytical being http://sporkful.blogspot.com/2012/06/these-dreams.html.
I had a new one a few days ago, which relates to an old one, and it’s opening a lot of things up, which we will be delving into.
First off, let’s start with the details of the dream. Frank Iero was bringing me a guitar. He was not current Frank, a rock star, but teenage Frank, a friend and only a friend (he had just started dating Jamia). We were probably both around 17. That’s how old we looked, and it makes the most sense based on other things. We were clearly both sad teenagers who loved music, but that club has a lot of members.
Frank was bringing me a guitar that he had helped me get, but my father stopped him, and did so in a way that I think the guitar was broken and Frank was roughed up a little. There was some other awkwardness and frustration, but I just remember being suddenly wide awake at 5:30 AM.
If you think it sounds like there’s a lot going on there, you’re right, but first I want to focus on the guitar. I remember being really taken with Dan K. Brown’s bass when I saw The Fixx:
At the time, I thought that was the most beautiful bass ever. Not any more. Mine was more beautiful, even if it was only from my mind. I did internet searches to see if there was even anything like it out there, because it didn’t seem likely.
It was a flying V bass with a long neck and it was all shiny and black. Yes, there are long neck bass guitars, and it turns out that Gibson once made a flying V bass, and Epiphone does now. They both have them in black, though not as shiny as mine. Also, both of those had white pickguards. That makes sense because then you can see the volume controls and everything better. I’m just saying mine was more beautiful. It would probably need to be a custom job, but actually Epiphone did work with Frank to create the Phant-o-matic, so them customizing, and the involvement of Frank, is completely legitimate.
There are other things that make it more problematic. First of all, I am horrible at guitar. I cannot stress this enough. My fingers are weak and awkward. I am physically clumsy trying it. My ear is good enough to know when I have it wrong, but I can’t ever make it right. I literally have less aptitude at guitar than anything else I have ever tried. (So that’s why it’s a bass! Just kidding bass players; you know I love you!)
Even if all that were not true, I’m short, so my arms aren’t particularly long, and neither are my fingers, which leads me to think that a long neck would not be the way to go. Even if a guitar were not a completely impractical acquisition, this one would probably still be. And yet, I could not stop thinking about it.
In the dream I had wanted it so badly, and was so excited to get it, so there was a real sense of grief at its loss, though that was somewhat overshadowed by the humiliation of Frank being exposed to my father.
So, the dream weighed on me, and stayed with me. As I was sorting it out, someone else posted about a dream on Twitter. Going back and forth about her dream helped clarify mine.
There was the symbolic, and the less symbolic. For example, I had just seen some pictures of Frank shortly before bedtime, so Frank showing up was not really that strange. Also, something had occurred two days previous where I was thinking of my father more, and so him being there kind of made sense too. I have been listening to a lot of guitar.
On the symbolic level though, and with that other thing making me think about Dad, there is a lot to it, and fairly emotional at that. I need to go into another dream, which I will do tomorrow.
For now I will just say that even though the guitar was not really a guitar, it is now literally my dream guitar. If I ever see one like it, I don’t see how I will be able to refrain from buying it.

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