Being the music writer I want to be

The best thing I wrote about music was not on the blog.

It was when "Master of Puppets" by Metallica was the song of the day. Three of my siblings are big Metallica fans, so I would hear them pretty often, but had never really listened. When I did, I was amazed by the construction of the song. The thought that kept coming back to me was that it was like a symphony.

That kept working in my mind: Why a symphony? Because it has different parts, like movements. Is that how they go?

I looked it up on Wikipedia, and yes, I can argue that "Master of Puppets" follows a basic four movement form. It starts with an opening allegro, at about 3:35 it slows down for the adagio, the scherzo (Laughter! Laughter!) starts at around 5:10, and then around 6:50 it returns to the opening allegro.

I put that in the comments when I posted the song of the day on Facebook, and it did not get any likes or replies. So, if everyone reading would please take a moment to admire Metallica, and me, I would appreciate that.

By telling this story, I have now captured it on the blog, which makes it easy to find. Also, that is kind of really me. I get fixated on something, and so I have to research it and I have to write about it. That's my whole MO, and if it sounds a little OCD, yeah, I've noticed that too.

This is something I care about, and feel like I have to do, so it is worth going over some of the concerns I raised over the past two weeks, and figuring out where to go with them.

For the physical stamina part, if I recall correctly, the show that I was in the best shape for was Jimmy Eat World, and at the time I was doing a combination of walking and an aerobics workout that incorporated some resistance training. I believe the increased endurance from the walking along with the core strengthening from the other workout was what made the difference, so obviously that is the way to go.

I didn't mention organization specifically, but I sort of hinted at it when I was writing about how many bands there are. Actually, I owe thanks to Pete Wentz on this one. One night he tweeted something about looking for unsigned bands, and I had this moment of panic because who is signed and who isn't?

It was then pretty easy to remember Revenir. I knew they were not signed because of something I had seen recently, and while there are some bands who should really avoid signing until they know themselves better, or have more experience, I don't worry about that with Revenir. They have a good sense of identity, they are mature, and Matt at least has worked with a small label and a big label, so I trust them to be able to make good decisions. 

I have absolutely no reason to think that Pete saw my post, but you never know what will come up, and it's good to be ready, so I am working on a spreadsheet. I am still figuring out some things, like what information is helpful. It currently has three tabs: Reviewed, On Deck, and one for suggestions. Filling out the Reviewed tab is the only reason I know that Third Eye Blind was 100, and On Deck has been really helpful for keeping track of whose turn it is.

I'd had mixed feelings about Suggestions. These may be more established bands. If nothing else, Joe Trohman or Alex Levine or Mike Kennerty knows about them. So maybe they don't need the boost as much as some band hopefully following new people on Twitter. However, in today's music industry I'm not even sure what "established" means. A lot of bands could use a boost. So, I will pull from there, and I hope at some point to also be adding more local bands.

Because of the cost and transportation concerns, that will not be right now. I think for this year I am going to try not to duplicate any shows. There are a couple of little twinges, that may get worse when the show dates get closer, but I think it is manageable.

This is where everything gets complex. If I do actually need more money, and if I have to give up on selling a screenplay, which has not happened yet, but could happen, do I change my life and try and find something that pays more? Would I even be able to in this economy? And money is a factor in the transportation issues, but those issues are also issues with flying solo.

Thinking about trying to drive again still makes me feel sick. There is unresolved stuff there. Finding it hard to be social and various related feelings has related roots. It can pose issues for the music writing, but is mainly about everything else.

Here is how I think things will go down. Next week will probably use some stories about the music writing as launching points, but it will not be about the music writing. I expect that will be followed by a week that is semi-political and then a week of comics review.

Then I will have a few weeks writing about music videos, and music, and that will be fun, and a good breather, and a chance to be silly at times, but with some serious notes. That will probably be followed by another week of comic reviews, and maybe some material on books and movies.

At that point, I will need to be done with this reading list, and it will really be time to get down into everything that caring about kids who have depression and eating disorders and suicidal thoughts and self-harming addictions inspires in someone who cut off a connection with her body and any hope of ever being loved many years ago. Fortunately, that writing will only be three days a week.

2014 will be a hard-won year, and I don't really know what victory will look like, but we're going to find out. And it all always connects.