Please don’t make me defend Katy Perry

One of the things I am doing for church now is working on the single adults committee for the area. If you are 18 to 31 you are a young single, and then from 31 to dead, when unmarried, you are a single adult.

When I was a young single, I did sometimes notice the vastness of the age gap, because there is a lot of space between 18 and 31, and even 18 and 25. That is somewhat amplified once you get past 31. I mean, sure, you’re an adult. Even if you have never married you are probably working and paying your expenses and doing relatively grown up things. Of course, in this case, many of the single adults have in fact been married, and then been widowed or divorced. Frequently they have children. Sometimes they aren’t even that many years older, and yet it still feels like a lot.

Anyway, I was originally called for A1 ward, but then got moved to CM ward, which already had someone, so I thought perhaps I should focus on mid-singles, since they do sometimes have events specifically for 31 – 45. Also, I am the only person under 45 on the committee, so it seemed to make sense. One thing this led to is that I volunteered to do the decorations for the mid-singles New Year’s Eve dance.

I did decorate, but I did not stay for the dance, because I just didn’t want to. I used to love dances, but they used to be different, and music used to be better, and yeah, I was not in the mood. However, when we were discussing the dance afterwards in committee, another member had dropped by, and she felt the music was very inappropriate because when she came in they were playing Katy Perry’s “Teenage Dream”.

I had to admit ignorance. Yes, I did go through that period of listening to popular teen music last year, and there was some Katy Perry in it, but not that one. Honestly, I can’t really remember how most of her stuff sounded. I kind of remember “Firework”, and there was something about “The One that Got Away”, but I couldn’t hum it.

Here, though, there was a real consensus that this was just filthy. I was a little surprised, because in other circles the song with the filthiest reputation has been “Whistle” by Flo Rida, but I hadn’t heard that either. I was skeptical, but did not have enough information to weigh in.

Let me add some background to this. Another activity that I was asked to be in charge of was a music video night, and I turned that down because it conflicted with my birthday party and because it sounded like pure torture. There was all videos from LDS performers, and included a seminary group doing an a capella version of “What makes you beautiful”. Well, I did remember that One Direction song, because that was part of the overall trend that offended me greatly of boys loving girls with perfect looks and lousy self-esteem and offering to buy them stuff, while girls sing about manipulation and then have nervous breakdowns in real life. But gosh darn it, there are no bad words in it!

I listened to and checked the lyrics for “Teenage Dream”. Yes, she is talking about having sex. It’s direct, though not terribly vulgar. Actually, it’s interesting following the path of the song and the title, because the point seems to be that this love takes her back to feeling carefree and innocent, so she is using the language of teenagers (“Let’s go all the way”) as the logical expression of that. And yes, I believe in chastity, and would never have sex with someone who wasn’t my husband, but I still have to say that’s not really that dirty.

While I was looking up lyrics anyway, I also checked out a few others. “Umbrella” may be code for “condom”, but you don’t have to take it on that level, because it totally works as either a literal umbrella or a metaphor of sharing shelter. It may sound sexier than that, but I can’t remember now. I can see why people hear “Toxic” and think “oral sex”, but it’s a lot more obvious in “Whistle”, so I would have to call it dirtier. I’m not sure that any of them are great for dancing. Not a single one of them stuck in my head, which seems like a bad sign.

So here’s my dilemma. I believe strongly in the power of words and of music, therefore I do think it is worthwhile to make some judgments about what we listen to. I do not blame anyone in that room for being concerned about what was playing.

I do think, however, that it is also worthwhile to question the way we are listening, and the values we are applying. There are lots of songs about sex out there, but sex itself is not bad, even though it is often used badly. What is being said about sex? What mood does it create? What relationships does it promote? I will take the one that makes me feel innocent and carefree and safe versus the one where I will never feel good enough based on my looks, and the resulting poor self-esteem is exploited by men.

No, that’s a lie; both songs are dreck. One just has a more offensive message. Shoot, a lot of the bands that I listen to now don’t even write that much about romance. They swear a lot though. I’m not saying I have it all worked out yet. I will say that a lot of the performers who look clean cut and innocent are only more dangerous because of their appearance.

http://sporkful.blogspot.com/2012/04/its-different-for-girls.html