The album is great. I especially love and relate to the title track.
One of the great things about the band is their constant development and growth, which is not hurt by them doing other projects. For this album, I don't think morbidity is quite the right word, nor gothic, and it's not necessarily completely supernatural, but there are all of these dark themes that come out beautifully.
I remember when I first reviewed them four years ago I was pleasantly surprised by their early punk sound. Here they are still very melodic, but there are reminders of punk, perhaps this time in a little more Misfits way. (Actually, I may be wrong on this, but it suddenly occurred to me recently that "This Addiction" can go well with "Don't Open Til Doomsday/Hell Night".)
I also feel like I hear more Daniel Andriano on this one - not just singing more, though he is - but where I hear echoes of his solo project, The Emergency Room.
Everyone sounded and looked good. Singer Matt Skiba especially (I think) is looking younger or healthier or something.
What becomes painful about this review is that the concert became a horrible experience for me. That was not the band's fault, but I need to get it out.
There was some moshing going on at the show. That was not really my problem, but it was related.
It started a few rows back from center stage. I noticed this one idiot with a stupid mustache and a Hawaiian shirt first, but there started being more people joining in. I especially noticed one fairly short man that they kept hitting into.
Another guy who was in the group did apologize, and the second band - together PANGEA - thanked them for resolving it on their own. I was not sure that they deserved the credit; it was not long after that I saw the short guy take a hit to the back of the head that didn't look good.
Security kept looking, but they only really did anything when someone was crowd-surfing. To be fair, someone dropped on their head would cause a lot of problems, but it's not the only thing that can be a problem.
Anyway, I was distracted by that. Moshing is only fun if you want to do it. It is also hard to control. The only venue I have seen really handle it well was the Haunt. Their small size helped a lot for that, but also they are not even in business anymore. (There were cool things about them, but the location was terrible.)
So it distracted me, but it was also not anywhere near me. I started out as just aware.
I suppose the first sign that I was in a bad location was during soundcheck. I was in the second row of people from the barrier, stage right (house left). There was a mic right there, but based on what the tester was saying, it was Matt's mic. It's nothing against Matt, but I never get tired of watching Daniel play, and it would have been cool to be in front of him. It was still a good location. That was my problem.
Shortly after they came on stage, I felt this huge shove.
My previous experience during AFI was mainly with people shoving for the sake of shoving and then moving on. I thought this was that it was, which may have left me more unprepared. He actually wanted my spot and he won. I resisted but ended up behind him, and was lucky to still be on my feet.
There was a guy who played a thug on the last season of Once Upon A Time, Sandy Robson. He was clearly supposed to be Wreck-It Ralph, but his IMDB credits just call him "Perp". Anyway, this guy looked like that, and he was built like an ox, except with a less intelligent expression on his face.
I objected, but he completely ignored me, taking out his phone and filming and putting his arms up and posing and loving his position in the second row of people. There had been a cute girl in front of me, and I did see him steady her at one point, but after all, he could easily see over her. (He would have been easily able to see over me as well.)
I'm just going to tell you now that I was only there for four songs.
I had various thoughts about things I could do. I envied the shoulders spikes on the jacket of the woman a little to my left. I thought about knocking away his phone, unlatching his watch, or pouring the half water bottle I had left over him. I thought about shivs, too, but I didn't have one, and I wouldn't really do that, though the thought was surprisingly attractive.
I was willing to believe that maybe that was his special song, but then they played "Mercy Me"; that's my song. At this point I punched him. That was in the shoulder, from the back. He looked around, and I told him he had to move, that was my spot. He looked mildly surprised, and then turned back around.
The thing is, I am capable of fighting harder and dirtier, but I don't know that I can justify it for a position at a concert. Also, based on his solidity, the effort I would have had to expend to have any impact was likely to get me thrown out instead of him.
It ruined the concert for me and I left. I'm not proud of that.
I would just never do that to someone. Where I come from, if you want to be up front you come early and you commit. That means not taking breaks between acts for the bathroom or more water, but holding on to your spot. Well, not him. He took out a person a foot shorter than him. He must be very proud.
The thing is, I really needed that night. It is hard to arrange time away from my care giving responsibilities; that was my time! I had been wanting to see them for at least four years. I wrote that review in 2014 because their tour was not coming here, and it was at least a way of hoping that they would come. It was because I kept looking to see if they were touring again yet that I saw that Daniel was touring with Matt Pryor. That's how much I wanted to be there. That I needed it so much, and that I wanted it so much, made everything that much worse.
And it totally drove home the value of respite time, because I was not at my best the next day. There is this mental energy that you need to keep someone with dementia engaged, where you have to gauge where they are and what will work, and I did not have it. I was drained instead of replenished, and I don't know when my next chance will come.
I have thought of things I could do differently. My only chance was a long shot, but if I'd grabbed the barrier and kicked back, that might have worked. I would have had to have realized what he was doing right away, and been really quick, and I don't know that it would have worked. I will not say that he wanted the spot more than I did, but he was certainly a worse person in ways that were helpful.
And it's disappointing. So that's how it goes? Getting what you want is a result of how awful you are willing to be? To which I'm afraid the answer is, "Oh good! You do understand!" but I remain disappointed. I have the political climate and my mother's health as areas for feeling powerless. A concert should be a place to feel good.
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