The other thing I started feeling pretty sure of is that I need to do #365feministselfie again.
It did not seem like a great idea, if for no other reason than that I was so relieved to be done with it the last time. Frankly, I'm glad I didn't have to capture any images of myself on some of the days that came after.
It's quaint now to remember how terrible a year we thought 2019 was, until 2020. It makes me a little nervous about the relief we have felt getting into 2021.
If this next year is as hard or harder, do I really want to be broadcasting the images of how it is grinding me down? My full humanity includes my suffering, but I would rather share the good parts. It's more fun. I would rather have less suffering going forward.
I was thinking that maybe I could take photos daily, but then only post them weekly. Melissa McEwan was a big influence on me for #365feministselfie, and that was how she did it.
There has also been a thought (which I will go into more tomorrow) that perhaps I should post more pet pictures and flower pictures and more things to spread brightness.
I was thinking about that, and then I got the bright idea that maybe instead of using my digital camera and having to upload daily, that maybe I should install Instagram on my phone and post there.
I cannot get the app installed on my phone.
That may be my lack of skill with technology, but also I did not successfully log in to the Instagram page first, because I don't remember what password I used. I thought a simple password reset via the Instagram page on my PC (which I am pretty good at using) would resolve that, but the button for resetting the password is grayed out.
I suspect that with enough effort and asking around I could manage it, but I am not sufficiently invested.
I also thought that perhaps I could use Facebook on my phone, just for selfies. I worried about turning into one of those people with their faces constantly in their phone, but I am pretty good at leaving my phone in my purse in the other room. It believed I could manage.
I know my Facebook password -- that wasn't the problem -- but I couldn't make that work on my phone either.
At that point I decided I was probably better off just using my old method. Now the pictures won't upload.
I started on my birthday, Sunday. That way, I will have completed 365 days right as I am turning 50. Wouldn't it make more sense to document that year? Maybe I will; who knows? For now I have two photos trapped on my camera. My computer refuses to recognize the various upload attempts.
I believe this is a cable problem. My computer is dying again, so I can't rule out other issues, but I am pretty sure it's the cable. I can test that more, but given the knowledge that this computer is on its last legs, and remember how devastating that hard drive crash three years ago was, current efforts are focusing on data backups.
So maybe the first selfies posted will happen a week at a time because that will be when I first manage an upload. I would be fine with that.
If that gets me into a weekly pattern, then theoretically if terrible things happen I will have a gap between showing it on my face and posting that face to the internet.
I hope there is joy too.
For all of us.
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