Rules of threes: Bands

Sometimes I think about Tony Banks and Andy Summers.

I would think about them, but have to look up their names. I mostly remember their names now. Kind of.

For anyone who is not sure, Andy Summers is the guitar player in The Police, and Tony Banks is the keyboard player in Genesis. To be fair, Summers plays some keyboards and Banks plays some guitar, and both do backing vocals.

You can probably picture them in your minds. They have participated in many concerts and music videos and recordings, and both have had pretty nice side careers where they do interesting things as respected musicians.

However, they are still less known than Mike Rutherford and Stewart Copeland, and way less known than Phil Collins and Sting.

I have no reason to believe that this is a problem for either of them, but sometimes I would think about what it was like being, "Oh, and that other guy."

Maybe they could form their own band, I would think, but then it would seem like that band should be a trio, with an additional other guy.

I would just get stumped on who that other "other guy" should be.

Thinking about it more lately, I came up with a few ideas.

Initially I had thought maybe Alex Lifeson, from Rush, and less known than Neil Peart and Geddy Lee. In his case, Lifeson was the only original member as they became famous, though to some extent early lineup changes are too common to worry about.

Yes, I thought, it should be Lifeson. Glad to have that straightened out.

Then, that very same night, Maria played a Depeche Mode song.

Crap! Obviously it should be that guy who is not Dave Gahan or Martin Gore (nor Vince Clarke who left the band early on, but is still more famous due to Erasure and Yaz).

There were arguments that could go both ways. For my MTV generation, Depeche Mode music feels more contemporary with Genesis and The Police than Rush. We did see some Rush videos, but they felt older, and they never played early Genesis which was fine.

It did occur to me that Lifeson would be closer in age to Banks and Summers than Andy Fletcher, but I was surprised to find out that Lifeson was younger than either of them. Lifeson was born in 1953, Banks in 1950, and Summers in 1942. Fletch was born in 1961; I'm not sure how I feel about any of that. 

(Banks was named "Prog God" at the 2015 Progressive Music Awards, so that might indicate he would lean more toward Lifeson.)

Perhaps the more pressing question is whether it is better to have two guitarists or two keyboardists; isn't there a trio with a lesser known bass player?

Still, I was pretty much settled on Fletch, but I turned on the television and "Release Me" by Wilson Phillips was playing. Of course! The one who wasn't Chynna or Carnie!

Wendy Wilson was born in 1969. She seems to only do vocals, and perhaps only in three-part harmony, which may not be the strongest qualification. However, when they spoof your band on Saturday Night Live, and your band mates are played by the youngest woman in the cast and Chris Farley in a red wig, but you are an extra, you know something about being one of the other ones!

But I was probably sticking with Fletch.

For some reason, I kept thinking of Johnny Marr. 

That made no sense at all; there were four Smiths. Then I remembered Electronic, and of course there was someone in New Order besides Bernard Summer and Peter Hook. 

It turns out that Stephen Morris (born in 1957) did it better than anyone. 

As a multi-instrumentalist, he would be a wonderful choice, and perhaps the most age and era-appropriate. However, when they wanted some additional keyboards for New Order, they brought in Gillian Gilbert. 

He dated her. He married her. He formed a band called The Other Two with her. 

He was way ahead of me on the concept. Kudos to you Stephen Morris. Bravo.

This post is dedicated to José Carreras -- the Third Tenor -- born in 1946.

Vaguely related post:

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2012/12/math-rocks.html

Shame and personal responsibility

I just finished re-reading You Are Your Best Thing: Vulnerability, Shame, Resilience, and the Black Experience.

This is an anthology curated by Tarana Burke and Brené Brown. I found it moving, but then I was not sure that I had absorbed what I needed to. I went through again, breaking down the twenty essays and journaling about them.

Previously I had not really liked Brown, whom I know to be very popular among friends. I didn't relate to her experiences, though I found her analyses good. (I was drawn to the book because of Burke.)

That made it interesting so see how many of the contributors consider her to be a friend, but also interesting to learn that in her research she has been criticized for oversampling Black and Latinx populations. She was surprised to hear back from Black readers that they had to work to see themselves in her books, but her stories do come from a very privileged position.

That is from the introduction, shared as a conversation with Burke explaining the genesis of the product and the need it fills. Then it goes into the essays of the different contributors, some of whom I was familiar with, and some not.

It resonated more for me, and yet many of the problems presented are specifically rooted in racism. That may be why I did not absorb it enough the first time. I care about this, but I do not suffer from it.

I think where it started hitting more the second time around was noting the effects of poverty and the stigma on fat; those are familiar. Being white (and perhaps college-educated, though many of the contributors also have degrees, often advanced) has shielded me from some things, but there are other areas where I am vulnerable, and I have felt shame.

I needed to go back for more than one thing. (One of those was a referral to Audre Lorde's A Burst of Light.) The quote that I needed most may have been from Yolo Akili Robinson in "Unlearning Shame and Remembering Love".

He writes, “Systems of white supremacy teach us shame because they have no guilt.”

Something I think of a lot is a focus on personal responsibility. I take it very seriously. I know the planet is warming, and that water and soil is not being treated well, so I recycle and conserve energy and try to reduce my footprint.

How many millions of people doing it would it take to make up for corporate polluters?

It's not that I shouldn't be responsible for my use, but that individual responsibility cannot be enough. 

Apparently Jeff Bezos thanked his employees for his space flight. 

I think it's great that Wally Funk got to finally go into space, but was the flight itself that much of an accomplishment? If so, would it justify the employees abused and the businesses destroyed by Amazon? Even more, given the vast wealth Bezos has, couldn't a great deal still be accomplished with reasonable working conditions?

These things may not seem directly related to white supremacy, but they all fold into dominator culture, with greed and racism feeding off of each other in a cycle.

I have noted before how greed kills guilt; I can see where racism does too, and really any other reason for deciding someone is less. Others are clearly lazy, or incompetent, or in some way inferior where their suffering is justified, but mine would not be; I am not like that.

That's not how it works, and nothing good can come of it.

I saw a comment on individual choice for masking and social distancing, that people need to choose to protect themselves. Well, if the mask were as good at keeping disease out as it is in keeping it in, that might be a reasonable statement.

As it is, globally over 4 million dead, over 600,000 in the United States. Mitch McConnell and Fox News may be starting to feel guilty (or vulnerable to lawsuit) based on recent statements, but there are many who have contributed, and are still going strong. No guilt.

Here is another line from Yolo Akili Robinson:

“Rejecting shame for Black lives means rejecting individual responsibility for structural failures.”

We may not all be included in that statement, but when there is a structural failure -- and there are many -- we need to be able to recognize it. 

It is not rejecting personal responsibility to know when it is not enough.

Me and Layla F. Saad's Me and White Supremacy

I have already written about this book on the Sunday blog:

https://preparedspork.blogspot.com/2021/05/fighting-white-supremacy-cleansing.html

That post had its own context, though, and I did not write everything.

One thing I did admit is that I had a bad attitude about the book right from the beginning.

Although I was pleased that it was not written by a white person -- as their books often tend to be the most popular among other white people -- Saad is not from the United States. The US has its own specific problems with racism (though we have done a great deal of successful exporting), and it may be more valuable to hear from people who have dealt specifically with that. 

Right now, the book I would recommend most strongly is Austin Channing Brown's I'm Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made For Whiteness. It is excellent, and touching, but even so I found it from an article where I was once again irritated by Robin DiAngelo, so there's that.

(Yes, I know I'm white.)

(Also, racism is a big enough deal that reading more than one book is advisable; just let some of your author choices be people who actually have to deal with it.)

There were things that made Saad's book a good fit for the book group. It is divided into individual assignments that build on each other, with discussion questions and a section in the book on how to go over the material in a group. 

In addition, I really like the subtitle: Combat Racism, Change the World, and Become a Good Ancestor

Especially with that last part -- about becoming a good ancestor -- I like that eye to the future. 

Still, I was frequently irritated with the book when it was going over material that I was too familiar with. Yes. I know that. I don't do that anymore. I have not done that for seven or eight years! 

Then I would worry that I was fooling myself, or trusting too much in my own growth. That didn't make me less irritated.

What brought me around to the book was hearing the thoughts of the other group members, people who had not specialized in African-American history for their undergrad, and continued reading lots of history since then, with it growing into a conscious effort to listen to marginalized voices for several years. 

(This sounds like bragging; a "but" is coming.)

As other white people -- mainly with the same religious background, but also people willing to join a book group that was focused on countering racism -- spoke, I got to hear thoughts and opinions that sometimes appalled me, but then, I also got to hear their growth. They absolutely did grow by working through this book.

That is worth a lot.

Here's the "but": if I were Black, I would never have been able to have been surprised or shocked or caught off guard by the things admitted by nice white people. 

That is part of my white privilege. I can do things to try and pay attention, and I should. I believe that is important. 

But it doesn't get thrust in my face.

One thing I had to question for myself was how much of that was merely white privilege, or whether a lot of it was exacerbated by how isolated I have become during this care giving followed by pandemic, burned out phase of my life.

That school board election comes up again, in that as I tried reaching out to other nice white people I know (all from church), well, I was ignored more than getting outright disagreement, but the conversations that did happen were really disappointing. 

Which I guess means that as I get out there more, especially in the cause of anti-racism, I will get more frequent reminders of how selfish, small-minded, vapid, condescending, and ignorant people can be. 

And yet, there's still not really the microaggressions or the outright hostility. Maybe I am not trying hard enough, but also, that is white privilege. 

If that allows me to absorb some of the brunt of it, I should do that.

Examining inner bias

Some of you know that I teach a Sunday school class with one of my sisters.

I don't even remember what we were talking about when it happened, but it came out that one of our students thought we were a couple.

My first thought was that we would not be the teachers if that were the case. We might have people be nice to us at church, but they would never let us teach impressionable 15 year olds.

I did say something like that. It wasn't as detailed, but in retrospect I felt bad. If he believes that such a thing is possible, I don't want to damage that attitude and innocence. 

That wasn't really the problem anyway.

My sister got really defensive. It bothered her, and she felt compelled to affirm her heterosexuality.

There is still a stigma on being a lesbian.

Yes, there definitely is at church. Our church doctrine could be better, but it is actually more progressive than many of the members' tightly-held beliefs. 

Beyond that, in a church that emphasizes family so much, there is some stigma on old singles. That may be one reason that it seems more logical that two middle-aged women with the same last name living together are a couple than unmarried siblings (of which there are actually three). What's wrong with them?

We generally assume that people assume upon looking at us that we are not attractive enough (mainly because we are fat) to get married. 

However, in our patriarchal society -- even outside of church or any kind of religiosity -- that is reinforced. There is pressure on everyone to be attractive, but there is more on women, and you don't have to look very hard to find "jokes" about unattractive women being lesbians because they can't get a man.

There is a lot that you can unpack there. Whether it is that not wanting men is the whole point of being a lesbian, or that you can find attractive lesbians, not forgetting that attraction is not always a cut-and-dried process, plus unrealistic expectations about body size and the impact of environment and economics... there is just a lot.

But what it comes down to is that there was an alarm that went off in my sister's mind that someone thinking she was a lesbian was calling her ugly and gross.

It's not fair. She herself understands why it is not fair, and a lot of the factors that go into that quick response, but it is still there.

Things intersect. There has been a point where people were becoming better about accepting gay men, but still had something against lesbians. That included gay men. 

We are in a largely white environment, but race would have an impact too.

Think of it this way: would the first step for my sister be to forget that the stigma exists, or to get over worrying about her physical appearance? Which would be easier? Which would be more beneficial to her? Which would be more beneficial to society?

Which would not result in that naive and optimistic 15 year old feeling bad?

I can't promise you any answers. I feel good that I was not offended; that seems like a good place to be. I suspect some of that is knowing more lesbians now and seeing them as individuals and caring about them. 

I hesitate to give that all of the credit, because there is this little concern in my head that it sounds too much like I have gone on a lesbian safari, familiarizing myself with their exotic ways. Plus, I know that interracial dating doesn't cure racism, and family members finding a provisional acceptance doesn't solve homophobia... it's just not that easy.

Some of my knowing things that don't work has come from the reading and studying. Understanding more about how patriarchy is structured and plays out probably does help too, though I also doubt the intellectual is enough. Some people will understand something just enough to exploit it.

Some of it is also probably having become more self-assured, and more whole. That might mean that not only am I less likely to take something as an insult when not intended, that even an intentional one might not wound me as much. I am pretty sure I am not all the way there yet -- watch me crumple under the right circumstances -- but I think I have gotten better.

So there's a lot of work to be done, on multiple levels.

It does seem worth taking a moment to recommend Suzanne Pharr's Homophobia: A Weapon of Sexism I found it very insightful, including it merely focusing on women and looking at race. 

Even when focusing on one marginalization, it is easy to forget other intersections. So racism becomes worrying about Black men, and homophobia for gay white men, and sexism for white women.

That is not enough.

This blogging week is going to be about that looking inside and rooting out.

Music Review: Timothy Buss

Timothy Buss is a composer and mentor for other musicians. 

While his web site focuses more on offered services, you can also listen to the music there, and purchase for download.

Listening to Solar Neighborhood first, the word that immediately came to mind was "cosmic", completely appropriate for material based on the sun and planets.

It is not an automatic either. Listening to the other collection, From Out of Nowhere, Buss's music is that same blend of progressive and ambient, but there is not that feel of being out in space. 

That is also completely separate from watching the available videos, where images reinforce the themes. It is interesting to think about what -- in the absence of words -- makes certain sounds evoke certain ideas.

With a total of ten tracks, it is worth some exploration.

All relevant links are listed below.

Cosmic.

https://www.timothybussmusic.com

https://www.facebook.com/timothybussmusic 

https://www.youtube.com/user/TimothyBussMusic 

https://twitter.com/timothybuss

 

Content moving forward: Music, movies, and books

Tomorrow I will post my fourth music review since getting restarted. It will be the first one pulling from musicians who have followed me on Twitter.

Previously I had worried a lot about calling them "band" reviews because sometimes they were single artists or something other than a band. I am now just calling them "music" reviews, though I believe I will still specify "album" or "concert" review as applicable.

I do not feel prepared to take on interviews again yet, but I have started contacting the band about a week before the review. I let them know what I am doing, and ask if they have anything specific they want noted. I am trying to go through one round of listening first so I know if I am going to hate them. That doesn't happen often, but it can make things awkward.

Possibly the other area for change is that I am still using my ancient AOL address for the contacting, which may make it hard to take me seriously, I know. However, I don't want to have anything but job hunting things coming into my Protonmail. Maybe once I am safely employed...

Daily songs right now are coming from my Black Music Month viewing and watching. Right now they are songs that Nile Rodgers worked on (performing or producing), but I will also get in some ragtime and songs from people featured in The Defiant Ones. Then it will be focusing on reviewed artists, both new and recent, but on specific themes in October, November, and December.

(Note: It has already been the song of the day, but "Hourglass" by Mary J. Blige, which played over the end credits of Mary J. Blige's My Life, is amazingly beautiful. If you haven't listened yet, do so!)

I cannot emphasize enough how much the review retrospectives helped me get back into reviewing.

Once I finished them, I started charting out books from my various reading "months". This is the precursor to building some recommended book shelves. I am almost done with that (the collection; not the selection), but it has led to a new project.

I feel that I need to add my reviews for each of the films that I watched for the director spotlights, and probably at least some of the films beyond that. It's really the same thing as creating a playlist after a retrospective: there was "something" here; did I absorb it enough?

I will definitely add reviews on https://www.imdb.com/, because that is the site I look at. I am open to suggestions on other sites.

Entering the early months was not difficult. In 2010 I read four books for Black History month and read three books and watched a video for Native American Heritage month. Things didn't really start getting out of hand until 2018. That includes watching 60 pieces of media (several were feature films; but not all) for one "month" that took about two years and will now require posting reviews for each, possibly on multiple sites.

Perhaps it is not surprising, then, that as intended reading and viewing got longer and more complex, it could never be reviewed in a single post.

I am still in catch up mode, where I have overly long lists to try and be where I want to be, but I think going forward, there are just going to be posts on groupings of books as I have thoughts on them.  

That may change again. Once I get "through" (should such a thing be possible), maybe I will go back to four books and a movie during the requisite months. That can not possibly be before 2023.

Also, I am really close to writing about some personal stuff again. I think.

Dee Barnes and Dr. Dre

I watched The Defiant Ones because a friend recommended it, and I really liked it. 

I did feel some hesitation to start it, because I worried that it would gloss over Dr. Dre's assault of Dee Barnes. It sounded like Straight Outta Compton did.

There was no glossing. In the second episode the documentary talked to Dr. Dre about, they talked to Dee Barnes about it, and they showed footage of the Pump It Up episode that directly led to it. 

It was still incredibly unsatisfying.

There are a few reasons for that. For me, one is that Dr. Dre's acceptance of responsibility is still pretty sexist. It seems that a great deal of his shame is because he, a man, put hands on a woman, which he calls stupid. There might be deeper issues that he could examine. 

Certainly there is some residual frustration because it doesn't matter that he says it was wrong, it still happened. He can't erase it and make it go away. That appears to haunt him.

I don't know if for him that is solely a matter of personal embarrassment, but it is also an inescapable fact that it destroyed her career, thus victimizing Barnes twice.

The low-level possible way forward could be Dr. Dre asking Barnes what he can do for her. I don't know if that has happened. There was a suit and a settlement, but regardless of the final amount, there was still the loss of career, and definite financial hardship for Barnes more recently. 

So, there might be something to talk about there, and restitution that allows the person who was harmed to specify the terms may be something that helps with a feeling of actually being able to put a situation in the past.

However, I think part of that feeling of emptiness is also that there were really so many people involved besides those two.

Dee Barnes was the target of Dr. Dre's rage, but she was not the source of it. She was a convenient target because of the Pump It Up episode, but that was two separate interviews that were edited together to stir things up. There were people other than Barnes making those decisions.

Editing aside, the material was unquestionably there. There was great animosity between Ice Cube and the remaining members of NWA. I had never heard of The DOC before the documentary, but I was mad at Ice Cube for the way he mocked his voice. So there is anger there that doesn't pertain to Dee Barnes nearly as much as it pertains to Ice Cube and Eazy-E and Jerry Heller. Other than Heller, I think all of them eventually made up, if not when Eazy-E was dying, then when they made the movie, but that did not undo all past damage. There is probably unrecognized damage.

Beyond that, there was the fact that a victim of an assault was shunned out of an industry in deference to the one who assaulted her, which isn't that uncommon, but it is still a problem. It is impossible to feel good about that.

In fact, there was a broader pattern of sexual harassment common in the industry. For that Barnes is probably the most prominent victim, but the total damage would be hard to calculate.

I don't have answers for that. The culture that is based on dominating and pushing everything that you have to take downhill is built on suffering, so it perpetuates it.

Religiously, I believe the reason that Christ can offer forgiveness is because he can also offer healing and resurrection, actually repairing the harms that were done. Then it can become sanctifying.

Without that level of power, I still believe in the importance of facilitating as much healing as we can.

This issue has not been resolved, but it doesn't have to be impossible.

Food for bodies and souls

In my review for Lady A, I mentioned interviews she did some "Food for the Souls" interviews for Black History month.

I listened to more than one, but there was a moment in the interview with Dexter Allen that got me thinking.

He mentioned his mother's smothered pork chops, and the way they filled you up.

It reminded me of something that the Gin Blossoms' Jesse Valenzuela had posted once, asking his mother about her putting potatoes in the burritos when he was growing up. She said it was to fill him and his brothers up.

Potatoes are good; they are very popular in breakfast burritos now. It's not like he was complaining about the burritos. 

Potatoes are also cheap.

It started me thinking about how there can be different perspective between the parents and the children, especially when they are poor.

Pork chops are meat -- though you can get good deals on them -- but Allen also mentioned the onions and gravy and biscuits that were a part of it, and then said "It sticks to you."

The other nice thing about that meal is that it can be made quickly, which I am sure doesn't hurt. 

I don't know how much stress it is for parents sometimes, just trying to keep their children full. I do believe it is a beautiful thing that so often those end up being favorite foods, and comfort foods. 

And then people criticize those foods -- which are often very starchy -- and discourage indulging, of course, but they also served a purpose. It is comforting that the only memory isn't struggle. Sometimes it is a memory of a belly that is warm and full, maybe for just pennies a serving.

I wondered if there might not be an opportunity for a album raising funds for hunger, with different musicians turning their food memories to song. It probably wouldn't work; people hate paying for music now, and what if they all turned into the same kind of country song?

But it's fun to think about.

And as grateful as I am that when we were filling up on cornmeal mush (which is basically polenta) or casseroles of rice or potatoes, or ramen (and not Top Ramen either; the cheaper packs), it is not fun to think about how some parents do have to worry, and that sometimes there isn't something rib-sticking available. 

About a year ago I had just finished up a fundraiser for the Oregon Food Bank. There are lots of food banks and pantries out there. If you have help to give, there is someone out there who needs it.

https://www.oregonfoodbank.org/

https://www.nokidhungry.org/

Wrapping up Black Music Month 2021

I feel really good about this month.

There was mission creep, but I liked the directions it went in. I learned a lot. I came away with some new music.

I am going to write a couple more posts based on it, but they are less about music and more about people.

It worked out well that it came along as I was finishing up the Review Retrospective. That was a good transition into doing reviews again, and my first new reviews tied in well.

Two of those retrospectives specifically pertained to Black music: Stevie Wonder in May and Black Women Rock! in March.

In both cases I felt like there was more to know. I had always known that I would need to get back to Stevie Wonder.

It has more recently become a solution of mine to create a playlist when there is something I want to capture. I introduce to you my Stevie Wonder playlist:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3a30gRgQOxVFw1U1NDeX0s?si=72e22679adde46ac 

I agonized over what to include, and I still have doubts that I have not missed really important tracks. However, I think there is a case to be made for just going back and re-listening to the entire Stevie Wonder discography every few years, and I can live with that. Having gone through and created the playlist, even those songs that I decided not to include are more fixed in my mind. That worry that I had heard good things and forgotten them is resolved.

(The concern that there is a more perfect arrangement that I have not figured out may be more of a thing I just need to live with.)

Obviously there was the intention to do a playlist for Black women too, but that has been more complicated.

Of all of the deep dives I have done -- into any musical topic -- that initial section inspired more individual reviews than anything else. Yes, I have bands that I intend to review from the emo and greatest guitar listening, but it doesn't compare. That initial list had 172 unique entries, including some team-ups, plus additional artists that I did not find until after but really like. There is just a lot there.

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2015/07/musical-black-girls.html

I could make a playlist simply reflecting the songs in the order played; that would not be well curated. It would be ground that was already traveled but somewhat shallowly, so it would not solve anything.

Initially I had thought it was just a matter of groupings, like maybe the playlist would be for disco and rock and with a little bit of blues, but that I didn't need to do the girl groups and the gospel singers.

Even if that felt fair, just trying to decide who is who for that is a challenge. Like, if I decide that the Blues, Jazz, and Swing singers can go together, and that combining the Gospel and Classical works, there are still at least five distinct lists, and maybe I want a playlist that is all Blues. 

So right now there is not a playlist; there are merely notes for listening more, and getting to know enough that I feel comfortable with what I know.

That is how a lot of these things go for me.

Music Review: Ragged Blade Band

The Ragged Blade Band is a St. Louis-based specializing in old jazz, blues, and ragtime favorites. I became aware of them after attending a presentation on early African-American composers given by two of their members.

Although there are some newer compositions, it may be more interesting that songs that were written over a century ago (in some cases) are still compelling and fun. It's not surprising when you consider the power of music, and how relevant songs from past periods of your life remain, but it can also be easy to forget.

Listening then becomes a pleasant stroll down memory lane, though the memory is more collective than individual.

Although What Kind of Love -- with a title track that gets under my skin -- is available on Spotify, you can find much more music on the band's Soundcloud. There are links for it and some embedded music on the band's main page as well.

I especially enjoyed The Tennessee Sessions for their liveliness, but I think many people will enjoy the humor built into "At The Devil's Ball". Maybe it will be more for people with mothers-in-law.

The Ragged Blade Band will be playing at "Summer on the Square" in Kirksville, Missouri on July 30th, and at the Big River Steampunk Festival in Hannibal, Missouri over Labor Day weekend. 

Catch them if you can!

https://www.raggedblade.com 

https://www.facebook.com/theraggedbladeband 

https://www.youtube.com/user/TheRaggedbladeband 

https://soundcloud.com/theraggedbladeband

https://www.instagram.com/raggedblade/ 

https://twitter.com/raggedbladeband

Black Music Month 2021: Looking back

I think the thing that really helped tie the disparate threads of my reading and listening and viewing together was the presentation on Early African-American Composers:

https://wccls.bibliocommons.com/events/60abd60c7b4a222500983acc

This was presented through the Aloha Community Library by Cherry & Jerry:

https://www.facebook.com/CherryAndJerryMusic 

https://www.reverbnation.com/cherryjerry 

Isaac Cherry and Jerry Rabushka are also members of The Ragged Blade Band, which will be reviewed tomorrow. 

Today will focus on their presentation, which charted a course from early minstrel shows through to ragtime to blues. There was an introduction to lesser known names like James Bland, Ernest Hogan, and Shelton Brooks, but they did not ignore more prominent names like Scott Joplin and W. C. Handy.

I appreciated that they did not shy away from the unsavory aspects of the minstrel shows. That should not be ignored, but the music should not be ignored either. As you hear the songs in their chronology, you can't help but hear the progression, and the influence of the previous music as new music develops.

They also made a point of how often the names that get remembered are not the earliest composers or players but the earliest transcribers; getting music jotted down allowed it to spread in a way that performing could not, at least back before recording and sharing audio became so easy.

Just a week after the performance, I watched an Oregon Symphony Storytime on Harlem's Little Blackbird, about Florence Mills:

https://www.orsymphony.org/discover/watch-listen/symphony-storytime/

There are no vocal recordings of Mills, and there is some tragedy in that. It is still possible to play songs that she sang, because the music is written down. Her specific sound is lost, but other things remain.

When Cherry & Jerry played Joplin's "The Entertainer", the listeners were surprised at its length and variation. We are used to a shorter, simpler version, largely because of its use in The Sting, over 70 years after it was first written.

When I was taking piano lessons, that was the version that I knew, not only because it was more common, but because I was not a particularly advanced student. However, I suddenly remembered that I had heard the extended version, on a collection of very old silent films.

There is always more out there; that is my constant takeaway. The "more" can enrich everything else.

Getting the foundation for blues enriched reading about blues influencing rock, and how it related to disco and then disco laying the groundwork for hip hop. It all connects.

It was a delight then, when reviewing singer Lady A, to find "Walking the Dog" as a bonus track on Bluez in the Key of Me. "Walking the Dog", by Rufus Thomas, was one in a category of songs where they tell you how to do the dance, like "Ballin' the Jack". A week earlier, it would have been just another song, but Cherry & Jerry gave it a context.

Cherry & Jerry will be at "Just a Taste Webb City" in Webb City, Missouri on July 24th, and at the "Oddities and Curiosities Festival" in Chicago, Illinois on August 28th, but you may find other streaming sessions on their Facebook page.

You can also find videos at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzKu1k40lBv0jfsTLZPZZgw.

Black Music Month: One Night In Miami

I really enjoyed the movie. It was more realistic than I expected, even if it is largely re-imagined:

https://www.esquire.com/entertainment/movies/a35204714/one-night-in-miami-true-story/

I appreciated the way each actor embodied their historical figure, giving an idea of their frailties but also their strengths and their likability. Well, maybe the movie was overly kind to Jim Brown; they probably could have dropped some hints of things to come there. 

As it was, in the film he primarily acted as the voice of reason,  especially trying to get Malcolm to back off in his needling of Sam Cooke.

This needling may have been the most fictional part of the created conversations. It related to Cooke's music pursuing a white audience and being rather shallow. In the movie (so I assume the play as well), Cooke admits that he has thought about doing more meaningful songs and was working on one, and then he introduces "A Change is Gonna Come" shortly after. In fact, Cooke had already introduced the song a few weeks before that night. 

The sentiments of the conversation are believable enough: not just that someone whose focus was on Black separatism might disagree with going after white money, or that a dedicated and religious person might find pop love songs trivial, but also both Cooke's and Brown's rebuttals about economic independence and the power that brings.

I see all of their points, and problems with their points as well. 

For example, Black economic prosperity seems like a clear good, but remember, we just commemorated the 100th anniversary of the Tulsa Race Massacre. Back when I first heard of it, the reading material focused on "Black Wall Street", though I guess it was really about the destruction of Black Wall Street. Anyway, that prosperity made them a target, and that is the story behind other massacres and generally behind lynchings. The perpetrators don't say that's the reason, true, but it is clearly the reason nonetheless. 

Economic solutions are important, but they aren't enough.

Also -- just for the record -- I think "You Send Me" is absolutely beautiful and moving. I can't trivialize romantic love or the thrill of infatuation. I like consciousness and inspiration to stay in the fight, but that fight can wear you out. Sometimes you need laughs, and thrills, and low-stakes drama. Sometimes things need to get a little hot. The brilliance of Marvin Gaye's What's Going On does not mean there is no place for Let's Get It On, and there are moments when Let's Get It On is more to the point.

What I keep thinking of is, oddly enough, an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation: "First Contact".

The residents of the Malcorian planet are getting close to their own space age, causing the Enterprise to make contact with their government. When I forget which episode it is, I can find it because I remember that Bebe Neuwirth played the alien who really wanted a close encounter with Riker,

Yes, the Malcorians were very similar to Earthlings of our time, and that included a dangerous xenophobia. Chancellor Durkin decides to delay relations with the Federation, to delay working on warp drive technology, and to instead focus on arts and culture. The goal is to bring the planet's residents up to where they can be open to other lifeforms and a more complex universe than they have been able to envision.

That episode was from 1991, but thirty years later we are still there. How frustrating for those who have been working on it since 1964.

A touching thing from Mary J. Blige's My Life was how many girls saw themselves in her, and so felt like there were good possibilities for them too. Representation matters for seeing yourself, but it also matters for seeing others, and understanding the value and validity of those other selves that are not you. It matters for seeing the ways in which they are like you, and the ways in which they are different.

That as much as anything is why my seeking out history has had to evolve to include seeking out art too. It has changed me. Not enough, but there is no going back.

Black Music Month 2021: Opportunities

Having reviewed many musicians and been friends with some, I already knew something about how hard "making it" can be.

Examining all of these stories close together (and not long after Simon Tam's Slanted) gave me a better idea of the racism factor. 

That was not so much the treatment from individuals, either, though it related. It was more the factors that shaped the environment, and what could be expected for those lives.

It was about the economic opportunities available, not just for those individuals, but for their parents and grandparents. It was about the economic level they lived at in terms of nutrition and health care and what jobs were available. 

It was the violence.

These were some very diverse circumstances too. Nutbush, Tennessee in the '40s is going to be a lot different from Compton in the '70s or Yonkers in the '80s, but racism and economic inequality still often managed to create hardships that were often exacerbated by substances. It was hard on families and youth. It is easy to judge, and there are pundits and leaders who do, but rarely have they needed to deal with similar life circumstances.

No one set out to make Ike Turner a likable or sympathetic character, but the story of his father's death is told briefly in I, Tina and it is horrifying. It doesn't make his abusiveness right, but it seems more likely that he would be violent and angry than not. Then, being a musician during a time period when cocaine use was very normal... you can see how it happens and still hate it and hate the pain it caused.

Thinking about all of that, I then think about how much being able to be musically successful meant for people like Tina Turner, Nile Rogers, Dr. Dre,  and Mary J. Blige. This becomes a way not just to be able to support themselves, but also to support the people they live. Buying houses and cars for mothers is a big step on a lot of these journeys, as is that the fathers are so often already dead.

There is a limit to what it can fix. Money does not heal the trauma along the way, at least not on its own. Money can be a fabulous tool, but even knowing how to use it requires some understanding that a lot of people just don't have.

In addition, I think about how talent is not enough. There are fabulously talented people who never make the right connections. There are people who may have potential but don't get chances to develop it. They get left behind. 

Finally, I think about how wonderful it is to be able to do creative things, and express thoughts and feelings and make something new, which has value whether it is monetized or not. Again, sometimes people just don't know how to get there.

So while I have additional affection for many musicians now, and have found their stories harrowing and inspiring, my overall impression is how there is the need for so much more. There need to be more resources for the entire hierarchy of needs for everyone.

Black Music Month 2021: Overview

Surprising no one, I have not quite finished my reading. I like the reason though. I got a late start on Nile Rogers' Le Freak because my sister was reading it. I like inspiring others to read things, and when people in my circle have read the same books so we can talk about them.

Also, overall we are pretty fond of Nile Rogers.

This is how things have been going...

I have finished reading The Beautiful Ones by Prince, with Dan Piepenbring, and I, Tina: My Life Story by Tina Turner and Kurt Loder. 

I still have about 70 pages left of Le Freak: An Upside Down Story of Family, Disco, and Destiny. I should be able to finish tonight, but things happen.

I have watched Ma Rainey's Black Bottom and One Night in Miami, as planned. 

I am going to have to hold off on The United States Versus Billie Holiday. There was a time when I remember watching free things on Hulu, but now it needs a subscription. Considering that I kept the Netflix subscription makes me reluctant to start any more trials, at least until I am gainfully employed again. 

(It remains a source of frustration that there is so much streaming content that stays locked into paid services, even years later when you might have expected them to move into a library collection or something.)

There were some surprises along the way, as is to be expected. I discovered a behind the scenes special for Ma Rainey's Black Bottom. Using some temporary Prime access for One Night in Miami also found Mary J. Blige's My Life, a special celebrating the 25th anniversary of the album.

A Facebook exchange about Patti Smith had a friend send me to The Defiant Ones (Peacock is included with our cable).

The Oregon Symphony has a Symphony Storytime series combining children's books with music, and one of their recent recordings was based on Harlem's Little Blackbird: The Story of Florence Mills by Renée Watson and Christian Robinson. 

https://www.orsymphony.org/discover/watch-listen/symphony-storytime/

Finally, our local library did a Zoom presentation on the early African-American composers.

https://wccls.bibliocommons.com/events/60abd60c7b4a222500983acc

And that is one key and wonderful thing. Even though there are things that I may want and be unable to find, there is always so much available .

I am going to go finish that book, and then write some thoughts out over the coming week.

Music Review: Lady A

I did mention Lady A briefly in a blog post last summer, but that was not a review. 

I like that it is working out to be posted at the usual time of Portland's Waterfront Blues Fest. Maybe next year the festival can be back in full force, but whatever happens, we still have the Blues.

The Seattle-based singer and radio host has been performing for over 20 years, with five albums available.

The most recent, 2020's Live in New Orleans, gives a good feeling for what a show would be like: full of warmth and laughter.

The humor can be sly, as on "Future Ex-Husbun". The conflict between the desire for connection and independence can be full of angst, or you can be cheeky about it. 

There are more serious songs, but they tend to either be a wistful nostalgia, or an envisioning of a better future. Mostly it is fun, for everyone to join in.

Lady A's Youtube series, "Moments in Black History" may be the best example of her philosophy. In it, she talks with other musicians, sharing memories of their lives, including food and music. There is appreciation expressed, and donation links and reminders to contribute and pass on that appreciation.

"Bless and be a blessing."

Lady A will be celebrating her 63rd birthday on July 18th, but is not slowing down, releasing a CD next month and working on an album for this fall. She also has various performances scheduled, including opening up for Sir Mix-a-Lot at the Snohomish Block Music Festival on August 21st. 

There is a schedule on her page, showing various dates in Washington. That would normally include the Winthrop Rhythm & Blues Festival, which will be virtual this year. Details have not finished posting on their site, but there are links to watch previous virtual shows on Youtube, including a February performance by Lady A and The Baby Blues Funk Band:

http://winthropbluesfestival.com/virtual-shows/

The Blues endures, even through pandemics and bad presidencies. 

In fact, during those times we need them more than ever.

Links:

https://www.ladyababyblues.com/ 

https://www.facebook.com/LadyABluesDiva/ 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCb19UqaBjWjvGpFs3JQ4cZg

https://www.instagram.com/LadyA_bluesdiva/ 

https://twitter.com/TheRealLadyA

Stronger with each tear

There is one more obstacle that I worry about for moving forward.

Surprisingly, it's not so much that some people don't want a better world and will be loudly wrong to prevent it. They are vocal, but they are also the minority; that is becoming clearer. We can work through that, but it is going to take patience and persistence and kindness.

I worry about having those resources available when so many of us are carrying around so much pain.

I wrote the numbers for the death toll yesterday. Those are big numbers, but they are nowhere near the full measure. That doesn't count people with long COVID symptoms. It doesn't count the individual left behind by those who died and their grief. It doesn't count the cumulative weight of all of the fear and pain and isolation that we have been carrying.

I have my own way of understanding this, and I don't have a solution for it.

I have pending grief overshadowing me. I often feel it coming in around the edges. I am not chasing it away, I swear, but also it is not breaking.

That kind of makes sense; there is more grief coming. My mother is alive and safe, but also I do not have a mother, offering maternal care, and there were all the things that hurt along the way. I have felt them, but I haven't really mourned them. There are things that have already been lost, but I can't seem to process those losses while the rest of the loss is pending.

There was a slew of articles maybe two months ago about how people were afraid to stop wearing the masks, even though it should be safe. The reasonable response to them was that hey, the pandemic was not over, and therefore there are many good reasons to continue wearing the mask.

There is emotional healing to be done. I know people who have become more tender-hearted and more aware of the larger issues, and that is great. I also know people who seem to be bordering on hysterics all the time, and there are people who have become much more hostile and resentful.

Personally, I find more difficulty focusing and more worry about being able to complete things. Also, I am positive I am more socially awkward now. I don't know how much of that is the care giving and how much of that is the pandemic, but I know I am not the only one who has lost something.

As true as it is that this is not over, and as hard as it can be to heal before you have established safety, I don't think it is too soon to start picturing healing, and thinking about how we want that to go.

I do not doubt that my posts this week have been messy and jumbled, but there was an order too. 

Monday was about getting out anger.

Tuesday was about looking at the situation, and staying committed to improving it.

Wednesday was kind of about that too, but it was also taking a broader look at what could be.

Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief by David Kessler was not the most helpful of the books I've read as I have tried to heal, but there is still a point to it. You may deal with denial, anger, bargaining, and grief on your way to acceptance, but there is also something better than acceptance, and that is finding meaning in it.

For all the people and the time that we have lost, can we build something better upon it?

These tears that I feel hanging over me are going to come, some day. I won't fight them.

I will try and keep learning and growing, so that when they come they will be a part of healing. 

There will be something beautiful about that, even though it hurts.

I wish you well.

Charting a path forward

Yesterday's post was about how the pandemic is not over, even though people are letting restrictions go right and left.  

Personal choices can still be made. I am not sure when I will go into a movie theater or dine in a restaurant again. I will still be wearing masks at the store. 

It's not for me; I feel pretty confident in my vaccinated status. It is for children and the immune-compromised and front-line workers and for the people that love them and worry about them. 

Not only do I want to help keep them safe, but I want to relieve some of that stress that can only be rising with how many people are making mask-shaming their new hobby.

(Plus, less flu, colds, and blocking some allergens doesn't sound like a bad idea.)

Funny thing about that: for all of the concerns that have been expressed about how pandemic restrictions hurt businesses, when the Enchanted Forest was ready to re-open, they received so many threats about their intention to require masks they had to delay their re-opening.

https://www.gazettetimes.com/news/local/online-threats-delay-reopening-for-enchanted-forest/article_7e06517c-0d85-55d0-9397-640fd59471f8.html

It kind of makes you question the sincerity of the fascist bullies.

As it is, it is worth pointing out that a lot of businesses have done really well under COVID.

For big corporations, Amazon, Wal-Mart, and Pfizer have done great. So have Procter & Gamble and Apple.

https://www.npr.org/2020/08/01/898099559/some-companies-report-huge-profits-despite-economic-decline-due-to-covid-19

Even some restaurants have done pretty well, though sometimes that involved adapting to incorporate take-out. 

That wasn't an option for all companies, and there are surely some businesses that have failed, and people who have decided to retire sooner rather than later. That can work out too, though there are discussions to be had about it.

Personally, we have gotten take-out from Chang's about five times during the past year. That may not seem like a lot, but we normally only go in person once a year. Their takeout option has been so convenient and such a good value that we went more.

They have had some dining in again, but if they are also keeping the excellent take-out options, then that is an improvement to how things were. One restaurant's options don't make too much difference, but let us consider whether instead of "getting back to normal" -- which was not really that great -- can we take this experience and become better?

If not everything has been terrible under the pandemic, what can we improve going forward?

For example, if working from home options have reduced stress for some employees, and allowed greater participation by employees with disabilities, is seems like that flexibility should be continued going forward.

If stimulus checks reduced food insecurity and hardship, which in turn reduced anxiety and depression, then that seems like something we should be interested in:

https://www.cnbc.com/2021/06/03/stimulus-checks-reduced-food-shortages-financial-hardship-by-over-40percent.html

There can be questions about whether the best way to keep that going is going to be UBI or wage increases. Regardless, that people not having to worry about their next meal increases their personal well-being and ability to be productive seems like a net positive. We should care about that, right?

If it turns out that some people are not getting regular access to health care, and also that some people have almost no news literacy and it makes them susceptible to all kinds of misinformation, well, that's worth looking at, right?

The world has lost at least 3,937,437 people, all unique individuals. That includes 599,089 from the United States. People are starting to say 600,000, and we will almost certainly hit that and surpass it before that is done. Not all of those were avoidable, but a lot of them were.

Are we ready to decide we want better than this? Are we willing to change for it?

Premature

Tomorrow, Wednesday June 30th, the state of Washington will be ending most COVID-19 restrictions.

They currently have 414,249 confirmed cases, but the unconfirmed cases probably bring that up to over 450,000. The death rate is holding pretty steady.

I am sure the reason they are deciding to "open" (besides pressure from people who resent any and all restrictions) is that they appear to be pretty close to 70% on vaccinations.
 
https://www.doh.wa.gov/Emergencies/COVID19/DataDashboard

Oregon still needs just over 19000 people to reach 70% vaccinated. I don't deny that is significant, but we are still also reporting new cases every day, and there are still some deaths.

https://www.oregon.gov/oha/erd/pages/covid-19-news.aspx

As of June 26th, I would have said the death rate looked like it was just over 1% as well, but with two days with no deaths, maybe that is turning a corner. I would take that.

There are still some things worrying me.

I am not sure that 70% is the right goal. I have seen 80% as representing something closer to herd immunity anyway. I wonder what percentage of people had received the MMR vaccine when they were having those measles outbreaks.

Also, I believe the percentage numbers they are using are based on ages. If we get 70% of adults and teens vaccinated, that's great. With no children under 12 being vaccinated, that is also not 70% of the population. 

Children can get the virus. They can die from it. 

Will somebody please think of the children?

Here are other people I think about: the immune-compromised.

Some of them can't get the vaccine, or they can get it but because of things that their body does, or things that medications they take do, they are not only vulnerable to the virus, but the virus may be more harmful to them. Frankly, it has been harmful enough to people without compromised immune systems.

I also worry that hitting the 70% mark will see a slacking off of efforts. 

We know that there are people who oppose getting the vaccine. They are going to be some of the number in that 30%, but there are also people who are not receiving regular health care, people who need a little bit of reassurance -- especially pertaining to their specific health issues -- and people who may have cost concerns or transportation issues.

I saw some Twitter chat about how easy it was to get the vaccine; even if for some reason it wasn't easy in your state all you needed to do was drive to another state. It takes a stunning amount of ignorance to think that. 

Not everyone has access to cars or other transportation. Some states are also quite large. If you are in the middle of Texas or Alaska, or lots of states, going into the next state is no easy issue.

Are we going to keep seeking out those people? Will we bring the vaccine to them?

That doesn't even get into the Delta variant. Beyond that, the more people who contract the disease, the more potential there is for other variants that may be more deadly or more vaccine resistant or more highly transmissible.

Donating 500 million vaccine doses is nice, but the population of the world is 7.9 billion. We have a long way to go to take care of everyone, and we do need to take care of everyone.

"We must love one another or die."

Auden ended up hating that line, thinking it was cheesy and trashy. It is also true.

Can we love each other before it's too late?

More on that tomorrow.

A moment of expression before discussing the pandemic

You know me; I am thinking all the time. 

I have several thoughts on where we are in the pandemic and what we should be doing going forward. Those thoughts are generally going to be well-reasoned and sympathetic, and divided into three different days.

Before I do that, there is just a touch of rage accumulated that I believe it will be helpful to clear out first. 

There have been many contributors to the rage, but I think what most crystallized it was some complaining about tips for stopping the spread. Although vaccinations were increasing, the message advised continuing wearing masks, social distancing, and washing hands. 

Someone took exception to the continued need for hand washing, since we now know that COVID-19 is airborne, and washing hands has nothing to do with it.

The burden of hand washing is just too much for you, huh?

Do you know that the last flu season was practically non-existent?

https://www.advisory.com/en/daily-briefing/2021/03/30/flu-season

There was just one pediatric flu death; the year before was 196.

The hospitalization rate for influenza was lower than it has been since they started tracking it, which was good because the hospitals were pretty busy with COVID patients.

There is a whole slew of things that contributed to that. People working from home and schools being closed was a big factor in people not getting close enough to each other to spread as much disease as we usually do. However, it seems really likely that the improved hygiene some of us practiced when we did come into contact with each other was also a factor.

Did some businesses go overboard with disinfectant spray? Probably, but hand washing is so easy and so effective, that if you have a problem with it I can only wonder what is wrong with you.

Do you want more dead children? Is that your goal?

Do you want hospital staff and space stretched out past capacity? Does that seem like a good thing?

Look, I know right wing radio personalities like to talk about how everything is too clean and that's bad for your immune system; but they're just doing that so corporations can roll back health and safety standards. 

There is even a point to it -- not the salmonella corporations want to give you -- but that anti-bacterial everything and overuse of antibiotics is a bad thing. That is totally true.

But how do some people deal with that? They stop washing their legs!

https://www.thezoereport.com/p/should-you-wash-your-legs-in-the-shower-the-answer-may-surprise-you-17905938

Then, even though the doctor who is okay with not washing them daily specifies that you should at least wash your legs when they are visibly soiled, you start seeing really dirty legs everywhere.

This is why we have a nation full of poop beards!

https://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/poo-beard-faecal-bacteria-how-14959212

Yes, you will find quibbling over whether there is actually fecal matter or it is just identical bacteria, but surveys show that 60% of men don't wash their hands after using the bathroom.

(Was the first hint that Michael Shannon's character in The Shape of Water was evil when he gave his bathroom philosophy?)

Look, even if it is really just a pee beard, that's still disgusting. Also, maybe it's good that the pandemic is moving us away from shaking hands.

(As long as we are talking about this, https://safespaceco.com/germs-on-shoes-if-only-you-knew-whats-living-on-the-bottom-of-your-shoes/.)

Humanity, quit being disgusting! Wash your hands!

If we ever want to move forward into a better, healthier world, we are not going to get there by listening to the anti-hand washing filthy-legged poop beards.

This I know.

Music Review: Blackberri

I made a note to review Blackberri shortly before I had to give up reviewing music. It is appropriate that it is with Blackberri that I restart my reviews. 

I am sure the was in connection with the album, Blackberri and Friends: Finally becoming available for download and on vinyl via Bandcamp:

https://blackberri.bandcamp.com/releases

What I may not have understood at the time was that the "finally" was not about becoming available then; it was "Finally" already back in 1981. That appears to be more of a reference to him having started busking in San Francisco in 1974.

In fact, I could not find a lot recorded. The album contains ten tracks (though the first and third sound suspiciously alike), and I was able to find two more tracks via a compilation album. Searches are complicated now by the presence of a drag queen who also goes by Blackberri.

As it is, Blackberri himself has had a long and productive life, beyond music recording. A Yoruba priest, he has worked as a death and dying counselor with AIDS patients, and focused on AIDS prevention, receiving a lifetime achievement AIDS Hero award in 2002. 

https://www.kqed.org/arts/13859162/meet-the-lgbtq-elders-who-rioted-organized-and-lobbied-to-change-history

The AIDS epidemic started about the same time as that original album release. Maybe other things felt more important than more recording sessions.

It's easy to know that there is a lot more to be known. I'm sure the album means more for someone who was into Bay Area music in that time period. After Blackberri there are seven band members listed, then fourteen guest musicians. I suspect there is a whole yearbook full of good memories contained in those credits.

Those are all good things to know, but it is probably most important to know that the music is good. While not every song is upbeat, there is a general sense of fun with joyful percussion, mostly in the Blues tradition.

Wikipedia says that his track "Eat the Rich" was included on Lavender Country, the first known gay-themed country album. It is less country than "Please Help Me To Forget" for example, with its mournful steel pedal, but it is fun and mischievous, including bad puns and chewing sound effects. "Bye Bye Blues" may be the best example of Blackberri's ability with Blues, but "Eat the Rich" is the one waiting to be discovered by everyone who misses Occupy Wall Street.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blackberri 

I should also point out "Return to the Reason", possibly the song that pulls the most from the '70s, with hints of Kansas. It has a haunting quality. Positioned on the album right after "Bye Bye Blues", that section may give the best idea of Blackberri's range.

For completeness, the two tracks not on the album that can be found on Spotify are "Flowers, the Weeds" and "When Will the Ignorance End". They are listed as being on From Walls to Roses: Songs of Changing Men. "When Will the Ignorance End" was also the theme song for the first National Third World Lesbian and Gay conference. It is as timely as "Eat the Rich", though less cheeky.

And that is perhaps the most important thing to note: the music does not sound dated, which is a good thing and can be a sign of quality. The themes aren't dated either. They should be, but the ignorance has not ended yet.

That leaves a lot of work to be done, but at least the music is there.

Finally can be downloaded for $7.00 (a bargain!) at https://blackberri.bandcamp.com/releases. The vinyl is $45, but it is rare, and it captures a specific time and place. For some people it will be a treasure.

You can also see updates from Blackberri at https://www.instagram.com/blackberrisinger/.

I, hypocrite

I found myself disagreeing with someone on Facebook this week, to the point where I was worried about offending them. It worked out.

It felt like a really important point to me, and a matter of empathy, which is why I kept going with it. Then I realized that I had gotten a lot of likes on a status of my own that was similarly flawed from an empathy point of view.

The one post was questioning the use of "adulting" and seemed to be a little annoyed, like do you want credit for doing the things you are supposed to do?

I get that, and I don't use the word myself. One frequent source of annoyance for me is when people try and add some flair to what they are saying. Often, this leads to the use of a similar word that sounds fancier but has a different meaning. I don't like that. It is still better than when it pulls up an expression with a racist history, which happens a lot.

In this case, I think people are trying to be cute because they are doing mundane, not-fun things, but that is what is going on in their life so if they are going to share something, that's it. 

I have a lot of sympathy for not having much going on in your life except for responsibility. 

Social media is for connecting, right? Some people do brag a lot, and some people overshare and regret it later, and some people have their primary mode of engagement as rude responses, sometimes followed with "LOL". 

"Adulting" is pretty harmless, I think.

But then I was mean about a complainer.

I am not friends with this person, so it seemed safe to comment. We know a lot of the same people.

She called her face mask a "torture device". 

That is so over the top, coming from someone who has clearly never been tortured, that I might have said something about it for that alone. However, also, she is frequently negative about the most innocuous things, and it was just like, "Come on!"

And I got 24 likes, including one from her sister.

Another way of interacting on social media is to complain a lot. I mean, you can't post cat pictures if you don't have a cat.

It occurred to me that while I do not like her because she is a miserable person, that she is a miserable person. Some of that is a sense of superiority that doesn't pay off, but probably some of it is brain chemistry and things that are not her fault. 

Also life is hard, and the pandemic has been hard, even if wearing a face mask -- especially for someone who works from home -- is not the hardest part of it.

People are stupid and annoying a lot. Sometimes making fun of them acts as a salve for putting up with them. But they are still people.

I plan to think twice about mocking people going forward, especially on social media.

Money talks

A connecting thread between Monday's and Tuesday's posts goes to a lifelong problem of mine: I hate asking for money.

Technically, I hate asking for anything. We covered that in February.

I guess money is more of an issue because it's so practical; when would it not come in handy?

On the most basic level, this means that while I can be a good worker in a variety of jobs, including ringing up purchases that shoppers have already decided on, I have always avoided sales (and collections).

It has also meant that while I have at times tried innovations like linking my Paypal to my blog, or promoting my novels, and though I have done the occasional Facebook fundraiser, those things also give me stomach cramps.

At the same time, I often don't want to charge for things. 

Some people do like my blog. There are things like Patreon subscriptions. I know that, but I don't think the amount of money I could take in could possibly be worth shutting some people out, especially if I am writing about something important. 

For the record, I have looked at including ads. While that might be more reasonable than a paywall, I believe it would make the reading experience much more annoying. For the amount of revenue it brings in, it doesn't seem worth it.

When I have done well financially, it is generally because I was dealing with someone who not only believed that I would do a good job, but was also ethical, maybe even generous. I know people who could have low-balled me and didn't. However, get a few changes in management and it becomes a source of resentment instead.

That means that as I examine potential career paths, anything that would require a great deal of self-promotion is unappealing.

It also makes the wage question very stressful.

It is hard to assert my worth. Desperation doesn't help.

That is why my saying that I could not live on the pay for the one job was an amazing step forward. Unless it backfires. As I wait to hear from this most recent round of job applications, I admit to worrying.

It's been a while since I remember feeling so much fear. That doesn't feel like me. I know my confidence has taken a hit over the last few years, but when does it come back?

Clearly this post does not have a strong central theme, and is kind of a bummer (therefore how could I charge for it?), but here are three purposes it serves.

1.  This is an update of where I am now.
2.  Earlier posts about various emotional issues and early trauma totally relate.
3.  I don't always stress that I am against capitalism -- I mean, I am still participating in it, whether I like it or not -- but that I am anti-capitalist should not surprise anyone. Capitalism sucks.

There will eventually be much more detailed and less personal posts about capitalism sucking, but I'm still studying.

Related posts:

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2021/02/always-somehow-wrong.html 

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2021/02/failure-to-communicate.html 

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2021/02/unable-to-ask.html

Speaking of job hunting...

The job that I am most optimistic about now is one that I applied for online, but that a former coworker recommended me for. I got an interview because of that recommendation. In fact, the interviewer tried to find my original application among the others and couldn't, but they routinely get hundred of applications.

Applying for a different job around the same time, I finally heard back from them. I was not in the eliminated group, but I was not in the group going forward either. They had so many applicants that there are many qualified applicants that they will not interview unless a large percentage of the group chosen for interviews doesn't work out.

About those signs that say no one wants to work anymore...

Yes, people want to work. They have also learned that life is short.

They have learned that some employers might furlough you, take PPE loans and put that toward management and executive pay -- because they never cared about you -- and then be very offended that you are not loyal when they want you back.

I have not blogged about this, but I did post about it on Facebook. I had applied for another job with an old employer. I did get an offer, but the pay was too low for me to live on, as well as being less than my starting wage with the same company in 2010. It was a different position, yes, but also, it has been eleven years. 

I did not refuse the job. I said it would not be enough money and left an opening. 

Having done the math, it was $4.05 less per hour than I need. It would take three weeks wages per month just to make the house payment. 

If they offered even $2.55 more per hour, while life would still be a struggle I would have taken it. That would have shown me that they valued me and what I could bring to the position.

They said "Thank you" and ended the call.

I would not be valued, was my takeaway. They didn't even care how much more I wanted.

I believe it would have been different if I had been negotiating with the initial interviewers, whom I know really liked me. This company has all of the negotiation done by HR, and their HR is also known for being very cliquish and holding grudges. (This is why there is no point in even looking there again for at least another decade.) I understand the policy, but I think it has drawbacks.

Here is the other thing: for someone who has been working anywhere in the food industry, chances are the wage that is too low for my expenses would be a significant raise for them. And, while it would certainly be viewed as more professional, there is a good chance that a lot of waiters and cashiers and bus staff could do it. They have experience in dealing with the public and they are certainly more tech-savvy than when I entered the work force... they can do it. A lot of them probably already have.

Let us turn our attention to the following headline:

https://www.dispatch.com/story/business/2021/06/21/ohio-companies-wendys-evenflo-hard-rock-casino-cincinnati-worker-shortage/7691469002/

"Desperate employers in Ohio luring workers with pay, perks and pizza"

Notice that the first desperate measure mentioned is raising starting pay to $15 an hour, a wage that many have been fighting to make the new minimum wage. This is what desperation looks like in the corporate world: paying people money that they might be able to live on.

Notice this one:

https://www.salon.com/2017/04/28/labor-is-being-paid-first-again-american-airlines-investors-complain-after-company-gives-pilots-and-flight-attendants-raises/

"Some shareholders say they are frustrated that corporate profits went to actual workers before them"

This is a good thing. If the stock market doing well requires the working force to be doing poorly, screw the stock market. 

When stocks go up, they're more expensive, right? And that's considered a good thing for the people who have stocks, but it does not automatically translate into a tangible good for the economy. We have seen many companies making profits lay off employees to try and increase stock prices. It offends me how wrong that is.

Finally, one last quote from someone I hate:

"Nowhere else in America can businesses get away with agreeing not to pay their workers a fair market rate on the theory that their product is defined by not paying their workers a fair market rate." -- Brett Kavanaugh on the NCAA antitrust case.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/college/2021/06/21/justice-brett-kavanaugh-rips-ncaa-in-shawne-alston-opinion/7771281002/

As it is, he is kind of wrong with assuming that's a given. If you look at the arguments against that $15 minimum wage, they often come down to the price on fast food going up, and then devolve into arguments that those are low-skilled workers who aren't worth a living wage anyway.

Well, they are moving on. They have a right to, and I am glad for them.

I really want something to work out for me too, but I don't need other people to suffer for it.

Now what?

Friday I mentioned that with those last two posts done, there was a relief to having completed things that were important to me and that had worried me.

The release is still there, but it has raised further questions.

I suppose it was connecting the defense of James Dewees to the school board elections. In both cases, here was something that felt very important, and that I was noticing things that other people were missing. Also, both involved a fair amount of research. 

It felt good writing them. There was agitation too, but it ultimately was satisfactory following clues and finding answers. It felt good writing it out.

I might be a reporter. I might be a crusader. 

While I don't have much in the way of training, I do have a sharp mind, including a good memory and skill at making connections, and a good grasp of the English language.

Unfortunately, I am quite positive that I can't make a living at this. 

People who have been completed journalism school and won awards for their work are struggling to make a living; this is not a good time to break in.

In the past, my writing has always been disconnected from making a living anyway, but for most of that time period I had a job that was at least getting by. 

That seems like less of an option now. It is hard to assess how much of my exhaustion is residue from the care giving and will continue to get better, or how much of it is just being older and much more beaten down by the world. I know that once I am working again -- which needs to be soon -- I won't be able to keep up with the pace of reading and writing and researching that I am doing. I am not satisfied with my pace now, so subtracting (at least) 40 hours per week is not going to improve that. 

That's fine. That is life. I am just trying to sort out a path that seems right.

The other downside to this need to raise alarms and advocate and teach is that I don't really have much of an audience. I mentioned that in the post about the press failing us. If something is really important, and attention and change is needed, I am not particularly helpful for that.

Would anyone famous like to hire me to be their ghost writer?

(For clarity, on publish day most of my blog posts gets between 20 to 30 views. It is less for the music posts, but they were higher before the break. After a few weeks the page hits go up into the 90s, usually. I don't know if those are unique views or repeats.)

I could work on building up my reader count, but it would probably require building up my Twitter count. 

Currently, my social media is mostly relationship based. I do follow some people who don't follow me, but I like them or think they tweet good things. Mostly I see tweets from people I care about, and can somewhat keep track of, and that's the way I like it.

Do I change that?

I have had this idea that if fame seemed likely, I would lock @sultryglebe and keep that for my friends, then build a new account for the public/promotional side. 

That does not sound like any fun at all.

There you have my dilemma. Perhaps it is not too different from that of lots of people. How do I make what I do meaningful? How much do I have to give? How do I make the next house payment? 

I am not sure I can answer those questions until my job situation is resolved. Then, it might literally be a matter of putting meaning on hold for a while. 

Plus, if I start trying to build a follower count, and then I can't maintain it while working full time (I had more readers before my posting frequency started dropping), well, does it even make sense to try?

Related post:

https://sporkful.blogspot.com/2021/06/how-and-why-press-is-failing-us.html

Review Retrospective: James Dewees

This is the 22nd review retrospective, and the finale. I am taking a moment to savor that. 

My last posted review was on April 20th, 2020. The frequency had been declining for a while. The distance I felt from where I had been seemed insurmountable. Spending this time filling out the spreadsheet and working on playlists and just remembering, I feel the ability -- and an eagerness -- to try it again.

As it was, that last review was  Reggie and the Full Effect, and that is my favorite band. For all the musicians who have participated, though, that project is James Dewees, and he feels like the appropriate point of reference.

For things that I want to do but can't get to, often it means I am starting wrong. I could not write my first review unless I made it The All-American Rejects. Trying to fight that is why their review appeared almost two months after I saw them. 

I could not make writing the retrospective work until I started it with My Chemical Romance. They were the start of my getting back into music then, even if I was trying to forget that because I am not sure how mad I am at them now. 

(Also, I now feel that I was remiss in not giving the Misfits a song; "Saturday Night" should have been in there.)

James has to be the culmination, because of the role he has played in me reviewing music. I have written more reviews for him than anyone else, with six. The runner up is a tie between Torche and Fall Out Boy, at three each, and there are lots of doubles. In addition to that last one, review 665 (after 654 unique bands and artists), the first time was as my 27th review, and 28th band. 

There was a lot of ground covered in between. I do cringe at some of the early reviews. I am also still proud of them, in a way, but I like to think I've gotten better.

As I was coming alive again after a period of burnout -- and it was about writing but it was through music -- James was a part of that, even though I was not aware of him. I remember an interview where Ray Toro was talking about how My Chemical Romance puts songs together, and he mentioned that their keyboardist knew a lot about music and often had ideas. MCR has influenced a lot of bands, and The Get Up Kids have too, including bands I was listening to then. I think there is better music in the world because of James Dewees, beyond what is credited to him.

Then, once I did know that he existed, and that he had his own music, "Take Me Home Please" struck me like a bolt of lightning. Specifically, it struck in the heart and infatuated me.

I had fallen for musicians many times on the strength of songs and vocal delivery. That wasn't even just as a teenager; as a child that included Shaun Cassidy and Bob McGrath! However, it has been a while. Part of that reviving after feeling so burned out was kind of feeling younger again, like all of that spirit was not irretrievably lost. So, even though it felt embarrassing to have a musician crush at that age, and it was a relief to get past that and just be able to like him as a person, it was also a good thing to have the crush happen.

It was not the first Kickstarter I followed and contributed too, but James did the updates well, and some of his tiers were a bit more creative than usual. It was interesting to observe on that level.

It was even more interesting, though, because those updates meant hearing early recordings of a song, and hearing their development to the finished album. That is not something that I had really gotten to hear before, and that was fascinating. 

As it was, with the initial review, the new album, and then a concert when he toured on the new album, half of the six reviews were written within less than a year of each other. 

In addition to the strong emotional response, I really appreciated the variety. He could do so many different types of music, and change up styles so quickly and keep it working within the same song. 

It would be easy to underestimate him, because the titles were generally so silly and there was so much self-deprecation. The first three album titles were jokey enough to possibly count as a form of self-sabotage.

1999: Greatest Hits 1984 - 1987: The Lord of the Bling -- His debut, titled to appear to be a compilation album from a band you never heard of.

2000: Promotional Copy -- Seeing this title, record store customers expected it to be free.

2003: Under the Tray -- Despite a diagram showing the CD being under the CD tray, many customers bought it, found the case empty, and returned it. I suspect this is why I have never been able to find a physical copy of this one, the only Reggie album I do not own.

Things got more serious after that. Songs Not To Get Married To from 2005, inspired by his divorce, may still have some jokes, but there is a lot of hurt and anger informing it. 

Then you have 2008's Last Stop: Crappy Town about rehab. I'll circle back to that, but the next step for me was really when 41 came out in 2018. The Kickstarted album, 2013's No Country For Old Musicians, was really more like the first three, almost a return to normal before tragedy struck again.

Inspired by losing his mother and mother in law to cancer while his second marriage was ending, 41 has no skits. There is still humor in some of the topics, but it is also very raw. 

As someone who was being really crushed by care giving, even for only one person, and having to think about the eventual parental loss and just trying to be so much stronger and capable than I really felt, this album read and soothed my heart. I needed it, more than I have ever needed any album. 

I reviewed the album just a month before seeing him in concert again. Normally I might have waited -- I think I found out about the tour late (caregiver!) -- but I was processing different things, and there being two reviews is fine. He was helping me with burnout again.

If that was all I ever got from him, it would be more than enough, but then he released Crappy Town. 

That had initially been my least favorite, on initial reaction. I had started to appreciate it more, slowly, but then hearing the tracks that had been cut, and having experienced more life and music too, realistically, I was able to appreciate it at a whole new level. It is a brilliant album, and aching, and angry.

The jokes could make it easy to underestimate, but also it would make it easy to overlook the emotion. It's easy to do that with people who seem like they are coping okay, but it's a mistake. The pain is there, and sometimes he can get at things better by using a pun or something absurd for distance.

And now, even after all of that, I still keep finding songs that even though I have heard them before, I keep hearing new things in them, and appreciating them more. It might eventually happen with every song. (Except the spoken part on Good Times, Good Buds, Good Tunes.)

So for now, even though there is only this one post (though technically this whole blogging week was leading up to yesterday and today, maybe not obviously), Reggie and the Full Effect gets 14 songs.

Plus, with yesterday's post, and even with the response to the Noisy slam, he might be part of me realizing that I am a crusader, though I am not sure what I am going to do with that.

For now, 14 songs. Then I have almost 100 lines of notes from these 22 posts, of songs that didn't fit into the 161 daily songs, or bands that had new releases, and new band reviews should come. I'm ready now.

Daily songs:

“Take Me Home Please” -- Here's where it all started. Also, one of my favorite videos of all time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtRkpk67wG4

“Kanji Tatoos... Still In Style?” -- This song off of the Kickstarter album had the strongest initial impact on me. It still feels like hop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgjtf4GgGKw

 “E” -- This was the first song off of Crappy Town that made me realize I had not heard it right. There was more to come.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKcqf7ZY4fk

“Congratulations Matt and Christine” -- This was the first of his songs that I hadn't thought made an impression, but passages of music came back to haunt me later.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4kQk5rKM7I

“Get Well Soon” -- I did like this song right away, but it was only much later that I was able to see the video. About divorce, it has a devastated Loch Ness monster after losing the lake in his divorce. It would be unbearable with a human, and so gives a stronger impression with the puppet.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGW1ceFeNfE

“Happy V-Day” -- This was a pretty popular song, and I didn't have anything against it, but I remember really learning to love it watching it performed at Revolution Hall. It's a great song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wt97q1ArBo

“Broke Down” -- This was the song that immediately spoke to me off of 41.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smp-vNyoGTw

“The Horrible Year” -- I wish I could believe that his horrible year had ended. Speaking of being able to do more by cloaking the seriousness, that scream at the end is incredibly real and brave to me. It's compounded by the promise that the scream interrupts, letting you know that it wasn't kept.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VucpUeJUV00

“New Year's Day” -- This is the song that hit me most as a care giver, with all of the worries and exhaustion that came with that. It felt like it was predicting my future, though that has taken some detours.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJqypGoDK_w

“Fought And Won One” -- This is another one that started coming back to me later, possibly (definitely) at a time when I was just getting tired of fighting it all.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHuv3MRWWWU

“R” -- It is kind of miraculous that I am using three songs from Crappy Town. This one stands out because it is the one that is the most energetic without incorporating any hardcore. Instead of the anger, it is the attempt to rally and make it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7PriFwWpJ8

“Smith and 9th” -- The tempo and texture work well with the theme of the inertia and the train journey, but what stays with me is the line, "Hold on to hope, and hope it lets you breathe." Sometimes it doesn't.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwhnM_J80Z0

“What's Wrong” -- I also have two songs from Greatest Hits, which does not have much in the way of official releases, but it's some good stuff, so I had to put it out there.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dq2wGMnP24s

“Another Runaway Song” -- One reason I totally get the Kickstarter is that this earliest album has the worst sound quality, and budget matters for that. Still, listen to the complexity on this song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sXEYmLe3MY

James Dewees is a genius. I don't think he would ever say it, but that doesn't have to stop me.