Going on my mission - even early on - really brought out my competence and caring for others.
While doing my shopping for Christmas 1992, I also bought birthday presents for everyone for 1993, wrapped them, and left them where they would be ready. My family knew that.
What they did not know was that I had also bought Christmas presents for 1993 and hid them with the Christmas decorations, and birthday presents for 1994, which I had hidden in strategic places in my room. I had notes. My family was surprised and impressed.
(Unfortunately, my mother stumbled across the '94 birthday present for my sister-in-law and was confused and curious so she opened it, for which my SIL never forgave her.)
At the missionary training center, my odd status meant that I knew the entire Lao and Cantonese classes, and quickly cared for both.
There was one elder who wasn't getting a lot of mail; I not only sent him some letters, but I might have written to his family encouraging them to write. That may sound interfering, but he appreciated it.
I would get little craft ideas for inspirational things, and then make them for everyone in both classes. It wasn't that different from planning treats for basketball players.
Later, since we were having a Christmas day zone service project, I spearheaded getting simple Christmas stockings for every missionary in the zone. I had church kids help.
I do remember occasionally slapping down foolish remarks pretty forcefully. Still, I was good at liking people and wanting to be there for them. So whether it was teaching a confused elder how to iron (why did no one teach him that before?) or giving a really moving Sunday school lesson on Joseph Smith, there was a lot that was gratifying and came easily.
I remember feeling like I would be able to use all of myself -- talents, interests, everything -- on my mission. There was a place for everything.
It did take me a while to figure out how to study Lao effectively; it was so different from other languages I had studied. I think a lot of that was the different alphabet. Eventually, I started writing things out and writing out translations, and that worked.
When necessary, I could speak above my level. It happened translating, and talking to investigators. I spent a lot of time in flow.
So many times it was just so easy to know exactly what someone needed or what I needed to do. That included sometimes knowing that I needed to exercise faith, so literally knowing one time that I needed to spend my last few dollars on flowers for one woman who was having a hard time, and that money would come, and it did. Twice. I guess both checks would have gotten there anyway, but it meant more because of the faith.
I remember knowing exactly what I needed to do so I could translate. Once we were missing the directions to get to an appointment, and I just navigated by the Spirit, and we got there.
Many times I was also asked to do things I didn't think I could do, and then I did. After just a month in the field I was asked to rehearse the Relief Society sisters with a song for the stake talent show. I was not familiar with the song, and I had never led music practice, but somehow it worked out.
I was better at music than I should have been there. With my low voice, when three of us were supposed to do a musical number I should not have been the one the other two were taking their pitch from, but they didn't feel comfortable and I just did it. I once wrote a song and sang it as a solo, a capella, for a district meeting, and it was fine.
It turned out that I was exceedingly brave, and confident, sometimes. Maybe it was more my pragmatism than anything else.
We had some elders who took an initial request to occasionally borrow our car and suddenly wanted it all the time. When we needed to confront them, I was the one who was newest. I didn't think I should be the spokesperson. The other sisters agreed, and then clammed up. So I handled it.
When in the process of doing a lot of service Christmas week, we had missed a few study hours -- having been perfect for studying every other week -- our district leader tried to shame us. I handled that too. He knew exactly what we thought of that.
That was one thing I thought worked well, though others might disagree: I was in no way impaired by concern over what elders would think. They were mostly nice and good people -- I didn't have problems with them -- but for all of the insecurity and issues I'd had with the opposite sex in school, it was not a problem in the mission field. My problems were with sisters.
Hold that thought.
Otherwise, there were a few people I had a harder time loving and I felt some guilt about that.
There were occasional problems with my not being able to drive.
The San Joaquin Valley was a great big bowl collecting dust and pollen that triggered allergies. I never felt the regular allergy symptoms, but apparently the allergens hung around in my lungs until every few months they got infected. The first time my lungs got hyper-inflated so that every breath I took was extremely painful, and I didn't know why. It was scary.
But yeah, mainly my problems were with the sisters, and we will deal with that tomorrow. Before that, I need to share something I did that hurt someone, without intending to. It can be so easy.
Sister N was getting transferred up to be my companion. I was thrilled to be getting her because I liked her, and Elder F assumed that meant she was a good missionary. I said that was not the point, I just liked her.
Later that night, after we were both in bed, she called out to me. I could hear she was crying, asking if I thought she was not a good missionary.
That hadn't been it at all! There are lots of good missionaries, but there are some you enjoy more than others. It is better with someone you can enjoy. Anyone who had been paired with Sister L should have known that!
We got it straightened out, but I have to assume that the things that injured me were not intended to do so.
Except for Sister M, but only temporarily. And Sister W. She meant it.
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